Making Room for New Pairings
by Blue Crescent Moon
Summary: Kaiba and Jou get unexpectantly get paired together for a project. Will this spark a flame of passion between the two? Hey! 1st and 2nd chapters fixed! Kaiba goes to the optometrist!
1. Of Dogs, Dragons, and Conniving Brothers

Blue: Hello everybody!

Carrie: Get stuffed, this is a pain in the ass to fix your mistakes so you can't be happy while I'm slaving away here. It's bad enough this was posted when fanfiction still supported indents…

Blue: It's not my fault that I can't spell worth my life.

Carrie: Exactly or I wouldn't be here. And since I can't use the muses in before talk for this chapter, I get to tell you about a great new invention Blue should start using; it's called 'Spell Check'.

Blue: I'm deeply hurt here. My heart goes out to you dear.

Carrie: I'm just going to keep retyping this disaster…

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Making Room For New Pairings

The scene is a classroom at high school where Katsuya Jounouchi and his friends go to school. Jou and Kaiba Seto are arguing over some trivial thing, as you all know Jou and Kaiba are not very fond of each other, or so it seems. That's where our explanation stops and our story begins.

"Kaiba! You no good, lower than scum S.O.B.! Take back what you said or we might have to take this outside, or are you scared?"

"Never in a thousand years even if you were laying on your death bed, no, I'm not scared, maybe only that I'd be arrested for animal cruelty. Isn't that right, puppy?" Kaiba sneered.

Just then Yuugi butts into their argument, "What are you two fighting about?"

"Nothing Yuge." Jou reassured him.

The truth was that they had been arguing about Yuugi. Kaiba claimed that since Yuugi and Yami were the most flamingly gay couple to ever grace the earth, in his opinion that is, and because Jou was their closest friend he must be getting in on the action with them. The thought of being with his friends like that was an unpleasant one that made him twitch. Of course he would never tell Kaiba that he would rather be in bed with him than those two. A blush would always rise to Jou's face whenever he looked at Kaiba too long so he was constantly bickering with him to make people think he was red in the face from yelling at him.

None of that mattered as class was starting and Kaiba took his seat. Because of alphabetical seating arrangement he was sitting right behind that blonde haired mutt. 'It was absolutely _fantastic_ that the teacher puts me right behind puppy boy, things can't get any worse.'

"Guess what everyone?" says their teacher as he walks through the door. "I'm assigning a group project!"

Everybody in class is excited except for Kaiba. "Now don't get those hopes up too high, I'm using 'The Fickle-Pick-of-Fate' to determine who is going to be partnered with who!"

The class now looked like all enthusiasm had been shot down with a rifle after he announced that. "Yuge," Katsuya whispered, "What the hell's 'The Fickle-Pick-of-Fate'?"

"It's something new he came up with to partner us off. See that little box? All our names are in there and he picks them out two at a time to decide who our partner is."

The teacher calls out names in pairs, "Ryou and Malik, Honda and Marik, Bakura and Yuugi, Yami and Anzu, Katsuya and Seto, Tetsuya and…" Jou stops listening after the teacher calls him and his partner.

Yuugi and Jou look at each other as looks of pure terror pass over both their faces. "Terrific! I've got a nasty CEO as my partner!" Jou says to Yuugi.

"You should talk! I've got a bondage master for mine!" Yuugi is clearly freaked by having to work with Bakura.

"Get over it, exactly what are we doing a project on?" Jou says to no one in particular. Then, "What class are we in?"

"Listen up class, I want you and your partner to pick out either a Shakespearean play or a classic novel, nothing from the twentieth century folks! I want you to create a visual that represents the book and be able to summarize the book in a speech a maximum of six minutes. I'll hand out the rubric with the guidelines. And NO ACTING! I don't want a repeat of the debate championships last year…"

Bakura put up his hand, "Sir, what exactly happened last year," he said in a deceptively innocent voice, knowing he was going to embarrass the teacher.

"A certain somebody in this class that will remain anonymous, MARIK ISHTAR, decided that in a debate about the founding fathers of America he would get up on a table and do a partial reenactment of George Washington crossing the Delaware!" The teacher yelled at Bakura to stay after class because he 'knew damn well what he was talking about'. Some laughed some didn't because the teacher was staring down at them.

"Now get with your partner and decide on a book, we wasted enough time on pointless questions." He turned his attention towards Bakura as he said this.

"But teach, it wasn't pointless," Bakura replied with a sarcastic sound and a roll of his eyes.

------------

"Mutt, turn your desk around, " Kaiba ordered.

Jou reluctantly turned his desk around and replied in a droning tone, "Yes Master."

Kaiba was taken back a bit by the puppy calling him master, but he kind of liked it. Kaiba watched as he sat down and faced him, 'God is he gorgeous,' he thought, 'Shit! What was he thinking? Focus!'

Jou's voice snapped him back to reality, "Hello? Mother ship to Kaiba… Do you copy?" Jou's fingers snapping wildly in his face as he came to.

"Will you shut up?"

"Okay, you're fine, now how about _Romeo and Juliet_?"

"Why puppy, I had no idea you had such fine taste in literature," Kaiba said almost playfully.

Jou grinned, "I don't, but I'm pretty sure that's the only one dat's a movie."

'Should have seen that one coming Kaiba, think again, but what else can you expect from a mutt? Thinking… Thinking… No, there's not much else you can expect then for him to try and take the slacker's way out of something.'

"Fine, we'll do _Romeo and Juliet._ Where do you want to start the project?"

"I have a feeling that no matter what I say we're gonna end up working on it at your place."

"Great deduction mutt. Since today's Friday I can pick you up tomorrow to work on it around two."

"Sure, that's cool. Do you know where I live?"

"No."

"Well it would kinda help to know where you need to get me from."

'Oh jeez, he wants to know where I live? I'd love to show him where I sleep… Bad Jou! Bad train of thoughts! Get your mind off of Kaiba!' He only succeeded in turning his thoughts away from Kaiba after remembering that Anzu had told them how she wanted to try out for the swim team… 'Ew Anzu in a bikini, sick thought, sick thought.'

Jou wrote his address and phone number on a piece of paper and handed it to Kaiba. Marik walks up to Kaiba, "Going on a date with your new boyfriend Kaiba?"

"Hah hah hah," he said with fake enthusiasm.

"I bet you'd be at least bi-sexual if you were with a guy once," that comment came from Yami.

"I don't need advice on my love life Yami," he said icily.

"What love life ya frigid bastard?" asked Jou. Some of the class snickered at that comment.

"You're canine got the better of you that time Kaiba," Bakura said coolly, "You should keep him on a shorter leash, oopps, I forgot, you do that in the bedroom."

"You would know too freak, with what I've seen in your locker," Kaiba shot back.

Bakura proceeded to clam up as he turned an even pastier white than he already was. The bell rang shortly after and everyone left for lunch.

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Kaiba Mansion, After school

"Mokuba, I'm home." He had to yell awful loud for Mokuba to hear him on their giant house.

Just then a child of approximately thirteen years of age, with long, dark hair, came running down the hall to meet his brother. He did what he always does. Slide down the banister, try to do a fancy landing, practically fall on his face but always ends up on his feet.

"Mokuba, you're thirteen, you have balls now, doesn't it hurt to slide down that banisters?"

"Nope, you could punch me there and it doesn't hurt, the girls in my grade say I have 'balls of steel'."

"If you're only in eighth grade and girls are saying that, what are they going to do to you in high school." He laughed at the thought of little pre-teen girls calling his little brother that.

Seto started to walk towards the den when his little brother came running up beside him. "Seto, you seem too… what is that foreign word not said in this house? Ah yes, happy. You seem very _happy._"

"I'm actually not, just very, very irritated but I'm trying not to show it with all my might."

"That's the thing big brother, I'm used to you coming home from school irritated, but when you come home happy I know one of two things happened. One: You're really, really pissed and trying to hide it from me, which might I add you never have or will. Or two: you were talking with Jounouchi and he wants you to ravish him." Mokuba grinned really big when he said the last one.

"Mokuba," he said softly, "I'll give you to the count of five to start running."

"Uh, Seto, I-I was just kidding!" He backed up.

"One, sure you were, two."

"Let's talk things out Seto!"

"I don't think so, FIVE!"

Kaiba went sprinting off after his brother into Mokuba's rec room. He pulled the runt out from underneath the couch. "That's not funny Mokuba!"

"Yes it is, it's hilarious to irritate you especially when you know I'm right, that is the best," he said between giggles and trying to squirm away from Kaiba.

With that said Kaiba picked up a down pillow and started swinging at Mokuba. He had him in a corner, "Do you surrender?"

"Yes," Mokuba said afraid he was going to get smacked with that pillow even if he did give up.

Kaiba let his brother up, "So what has you so irritated, Seto?"

"Jou is coming over tomorrow."

"Oh cool! Does that mean that you are like going on a date or something? Cause that would be awesome!"

"Would you like, shut up like?" said Kaiba using a high, feminine voice to imitate and embarrass his brother. "He's working on a project with me that's all."

"Did he ask to work with you? Or did you ask him with that girly voice of yours you just showed me if he would be your partner?" Now it was Seto's turn to be embarrassed and blush.

"No, the teacher put us together. Oh yeah, if you want to slide down that banister tomorrow and _accidentally _knock him on his ass so he can be used as your landing pad, that's fine with me. Maybe I could get the project done if he was knocked unconscious."

His last statement killed Mokuba's hopes. He didn't really like the fact that his brother was looking at the same gender, if fact Mokuba enjoyed it more when Seto would bring home his secretary for a round and they'd spend the weekend together. But it had been a long time since he liked someone. That didn't matter, he'd push those two closer somehow.

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Blue: Look at it shine! –polishes chapter-

Carrie: Crap be gone! I finished fixing it!

Blue: -lip trembles- B-but you changed some parts!

Carrie: Yes, I changed the crap, get over it.

Blue: -cries in the corner-

Carrie: We're currently working on chapter nine so don't get your panties in a twist… Or your boxers in a bunch… -.-;; Whatever, maybe now that the first chapter doesn't suck I feel better. Please review, I love reviews.

Blue: I love them too.

Carrie: I've been taking assertive lessons, SO SHUT UP THIS IS MY TURN!

Blue: -goes back to crying in the corner-

Carrie: But I love the readers!


	2. Bonding

Carrie: Hi everyone! I'm retyping this in my spare time on the weekend while I wait for Blue to send me more material to proofread.

Blue: I feel pretty! Oh so pretty! Oh so pretty and witty and gay!

Carrie: **shoots her in the head with a blowgun**

Blue: **snore**

Carrie: Much better, now Blue and I don not own Yu-Gi-Oh because the Americanized version is for skimpy, wimpy pansies and needs more violence. My work has been done.

Blue: **snore**

………………………..

Making Room for New Pairings

The story picks up at the point of Kaiba arriving at Katsuya's house to pick him up so they can go and work on their project together. We'll start with Jou first.

BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP! "Umm… just five more minutes dad… SHIT! Is that really the time!"

His father's voice echoed from the kitchen, "Don't swear so loud, the neighbors have ears and some of them are children!"

"What ever you say," he really didn't care what the neighbors had to say nosy people as they are, Kaiba was going to be there in a half an hour and he was just getting up! Jou stripped off his clothes as he walked towards the shower, which was sure to get him yelled at later. He put the shower knob on cold, quite necessary after the pleasant dream he had last night, 'Mmm…' he thought about how Kaiba would look with all that skin exposed to him.

Jou jumped in the icy water, "Brr… so frickin' cold," he muttered absently, but glad of the effect it has on his gutter mind. He walks into his room to get dressed; then he goes down stairs to find his shoes, which had a tendency to end up in trash or the compactor for some reason, when there was a knock at the door. "I got it dad!"

He runs to open the door, and who would be standing there except Kaiba himself, big shock, huh?

"Come on Katsuya, lets get going, why are you so wet?"

"Shower, you know people do that when they wake up, lets go.:

"You are not going in my car with wet hair, you wet dog. Leather interior and all." Actually Kaiba loved the way Jou looked when his hair was all wet and his bangs hung down in front of his face in thick strands. He watched the way the way the water moved down his neck, soaking in his t-shirt, lucky t-shirt; the enticing aroma he smelled on him, let's just say the wet look agrees with him.

"Fine, give me a minute," Jou tells him with an irritated look upon his face.

Kaiba watched as Jou went to get a towel from the bathroom. His eyes nearly bugged out of their sockets when he saw Jounouchi pull his shirt over his head and dry his hair. Kaiba just stood there and soaked in every detail of his torso, he watched as he saw the muscles in Jou's six-pack move and stretches as Jou dried his hair. This was going to be a good day.

………………………

The car ride was very annoying for Kaiba as Jou had never been in the kind of car he had, which was a bright blue Stingray Corvette. He would keep pressing buttons along the dashboard as he tried to figure out how the radio works. "Would you stop touching things already?" He was getting frustrated with the mutt.

"Nope, I enjoy bugging you."

"I can tell," Kaiba got out as he grit his teeth.

"You're not nearly as annoyed as you should be, maybe I should sing?"

"Mutt, if you start singing you'll be howling on the sidewalk."

Nothing much really happened the rest of the ride aside for the casual swapping of threats. When they pulled up in front of the house gates Kaiba pressed a button on an intercom speaker, "Mokuba, open the gate, the stingray doesn't have a remote in it."

"Will do bro."

The massive iron gates swung open to allow the car in. Kaiba pulled the car to the top of the driveway; Kaiba and Jou got out of the car. Jou walked up to the front door and looked at Kaiba and asked if he would set off any burglar alarms. "No, none of the systems are on, just go in." A wicked smile passed over Kaiba's face.

As Jou opened the door he heard someone yell "Big brother!" and come racing down the stairway banister right at Jou.

Kaiba, who had walked in right behind Katsuya, shut the door and took a step to the left. Watch out mutt," he said softly in a hushed tone.

Mokuba landed right on top of Jou's chest, Kaiba picked his brother up off of Jou's frame and handed him some money with large increments on them and told him to scram.

Of course Jou sees nothing of this because he was on his back holding his head and groaning slightly. Kaiba helps him to his feet, "Are you okay?"

Jou looked up; there was real concern in Kaiba's eyes. "Yeah, I just hit my head, that's all."

He got up and started walking but didn't get far before he grabbed onto the back of his head and sunk to his knees. "Move your hand puppy, I need to see if you're hurt."

Jou did as he was told, suddenly he felt two warm hands sifting through his hair. "Nnn…" he couldn't talk for a moment, "What are you doing?"

Kaiba heard this, 'At least he didn't sound angry…' "I'm checking to see if you are bleeding. You aren't but I'm not sure you are all right. I think you should lay down."

"Why are you being so nice to me?" he murmured with his eyes half lidded.

Kaiba watched Jou's eyes slipping shut, "Because I know exactly how it feels to get tackled by Mokuba, I've had three bruised ribs and a concussion. Stay awake pup!" Kaiba clapped his hands together in front of his face.

"What!" He had almost slipped into an unconscious state.

"If you've had a concussion you shouldn't sleep." Kaiba picked Jou up in his arms so he could find a place for him to lie down.

"I'm slipping," Jou squeaked.

Kaiba looked at the blonde boy in his arms and felt sympathy flooding into him. "You can put your arms around my neck. If you start slipping again," he added quickly.

Kaiba felt Jou's arms slowly snake about and intertwine as he relaxed up against his chest. 'He's so warm,' Seto thought and blushed, 'He's hurt! And I can't think about anything but my hormones.'

He brought Jou into his den and put him on the couch. Kaiba knew his puppy had gone to sleep but didn't have the heart to wake him. All of the sudden Jou started twitching his arms and gripped at the couch, he moaned again like he was in pain. Kaiba shook him awake, sweat broke out on Jou's forehead as he woke, and he looked up and saw Kaiba's concerned face. "Having a nightmare? You were groaning."

Katsuya bit his lip and said sort of. He was holding a giggle back, 'What would Kaiba think if he knew I was having dreams about him? Or that I most definitely was not in pain.'

He decided he should get up and move a bit, he tried to but the pain made him bring his head back down again, right into Kaiba's lap.

"Um… Katsuya, could you move your head?"

He turned his head and looked up, Kaiba's face was a deep shade of scarlet. He realized where exactly his head was and apologized, "Jeez, sorry about that." Jou moved his head back onto the couch.

"That's… okay." Kaiba bit his lip.

"I should go get my stuff out of my bag," Jou said trying to get away from Kaiba for a minute.

"You can't even walk, I'll get," Kaiba mumbled.

"Thank you hand maiden, I'd like something to drink while you're up," Jou said in a very official sounding voice.

Kaiba chucked a pillow at him. "Hey, I'm injured here."

"Obviously not enough, if you can still be a smart ass."

Jou managed to sit up while Kaiba went to grab his bag. "What took you so long? Got lost in your own house?"

"Shut up puppy, I got ice for your head, but I could throw this at you too."

"Shutting up."

"Before I forget, if you ever call me your hand maiden again, I'll beat the living hell out of you."

"Duly noted, serving wench."

Kaiba then proceeded to push Katsuya off of the couch. He then opened a soda can and started drinking it. "Isn't that supposed to be my soda?" Jou asked grinning.

"Bite me dog breath."

"Don't say it unless you mean it."

"Like you could do anything," Kaiba retorted.

Lucky thing Kaiba had just put down his soda down because Jou lunged across the sofa, knocked them both on to the carpet, and pinned the taller boy's wrists to the ground. He forgot one thing though, his legs. Kaiba pulled his legs out from underneath Jou and flipped backwards so his arms were away from Katsuya.

"How the FUCK did you just bend like that?" Katsuya filed that away for future knowledge that Kaiba was very bendable.

"I'm just flexible, that's all."

"Flexible my ass, that was down right disturbing," Jou said.

"I can't help the way my body bends mutt."

"You should try out for the cheerleading squad with the way you move."

Then it was Kaiba's turn to knock Jou onto the floor, only he made sure that Jou couldn't move his legs because he sat on him. Kaiba thought that at first he was suffocating him because he heard him rasping for breath beneath him. Kaiba moved the bulk of his weight from his stomach and rib cage and on to lower areas only to find Jou's breathing became heavier. "Am I hurting you pup?" He said with a confuse look.

"Gods no," he gasped, "Can you get off my groin though?"

"OH! So that's why you were…"

"You're still on top of me."

Seto quickly got off him and saw that his pup was on the verge of tears out of sheer embarrassment of the situation. He didn't want to make him feel bad, no one was around, so he took the mutt in his arms, gave him a hug and whispered to him, "I didn't mean to do that."

"I know." Seto could tell Jou was still embarrassed.

'I do like holding the puppy, he makes me feel, I don't know, content.' Kaiba let a small smile appear on his face.

'It feels wonderful to have his strong arms around me, wait, Kaiba doesn't hug people!' Just then he felt something touch the back of his neck. 'Kaiba's… stroking my neck? Oh well, I won't complain.' He nestled closer to Kaiba to show his appreciation for the hug.

Then, the unthinkable happened, SNAP! There was a bright flash and the giggling of a young boy. "Thanks Seto, this'll make the front page of the school newspaper."

"SON OF A BITCH!" Seto yelled perhaps a bit too loud. He gently got Jou off of him and ran over to a hard wood cabinet in the room. He whipped out a ring of keys and opened it; it was full of paintball guns. Kaiba grabbed the biggest one he could run with and went after his brother. He found his brother hiding in the kitchen in the storage closet; Kaiba could tell where he was by the incessant giggling. Kaiba grabbed his little brother, took his camera, ripped out the memory card and started yelling, "Why the hell'd you do that?"

"Because I didn't want to see the two of you going at it in there, you do make a cute couple though."

Kaiba grabbed Mokuba with one arm and shot him in the ass from about a foot away. "I won't be able to think, you won't be able to sit."

"It's hardly the same," Mokuba declared.

Kaiba went back to make sure Jou hadn't curled up in the fetal position on the floor. T o his surprise he was sitting on the couch. "I really hope you didn't hurt him that bad."

"Nah, he just won't be able to sit for a week."

'Those gorgeous blue eyes won't budge from my face, I feel like I could just drown in them.'

"Pup, can I ask you something?" Kaiba asked nervously.

"Sure, what is it?" his small heart hopeful.

"Um… maybe you would want to come over sometime only as a friend maybe. You wouldn't even have to tell your other friends…" He was rambling, but then he saw Jou smiling, for a second he thought he was going to laugh.

"I'd love to be your friend Kaiba!" Jou knew he was a bit too excited but that was all right.

The two started to work on their project together and got a lot of it done, when Jou said he should probably go home and Kaiba offered a ride, Jou couldn't say no.

When they pulled up in front of the apartment building where he lived Jou started talking again, "Can you work on the project on Monday?" Jou looked at Kaiba longingly.

When they pulled up in front of the apartment building where he lived Jou started talking again, "Can you work on the project on Monday?" Jou looked longingly at Kaiba.

"Yeah I can, my place again?"

"Fine with me."

"You can come home with me after school then."

"Sounds great."

Jou walked inside and started thinking to himself, 'It sounded like we were arranging a date or something.' He giggled thinking about going on a date with Kaiba.

………………………..

Kaiba Mansion Again, Monday morning

"Seto, can you pick me up after school today?" Mokuba had no doubt his brother would say yes, but he would still ask.

"Sure but you have to sit in the back seat, if you can sit at all."

"Why? All cars have a passenger seat."

"And it will be occupied, if you have a problem with sitting in the back than take the bus." He wasn't getting much sleep lately, which was the reason he was so moody.

"Who is it, do I know him?"

A light blush spread across his face, "What do you mean 'him'?"

"Well it's obviously Jou, why would you have a reason to cheat on him?"

"He's just my friend, get that straight."

"I know one, no two things that aren't straight, YOU AND JOU!"

"You can forget that ride home now," Kaiba replied casually, seeming unfazed.

………………………..

School Room, Monday Morning

"Well I hope everyone had a fun weekend working on their projects with their partners." Their teacher had just walked into the classroom.

"Ryou, why are you still standing?"

Ryou stammered out his answer, "Um… I'm not f-feeling too well, can I go to the nurse?"

"Of course you can."

Ryou practically sprinted out of the room. Malik had an awful look on his face; Kaiba overheard some of the conversation that passed between Bakura and Malik. "After what I did to him, he probably, he probably can't sit. I know he hasn't in any other class."

Bad images of Malik forcefully taking Ryou came into his head and he shuddered at the thought. 'Well at least the pharaoh's twerp was quiet, oh yeah, he forgot he had to work with the psychotic tomb robber, no wonder he was so pale.'

Everybody get with your partners, and maybe you could get something done in class for once."

"Hey pup, turn around."

"Why am I a dog?"

"Because you are."

"No I'm not."

"Yes, you are."

"No, I'm-"

"You are."

"No, I'm-"

"Cause you are."

Jou was clearly becoming quickly frustrated with the fact that he was repeatedly being called a dog. "Will you stop calling me that for at least one day?"

"No."

"Why?"

"Because that's what I call you. Where's your book?"

Jou slapped himself in the forehead with his palm. "I must have forgot it at home, don't worry I'll just get another copy for today."

Kaiba couldn't help but have faith in him as long as he had that silly 'I can do anything' smile on his face.

……………………….

Carrie: Phew! It's done, I'm tired, I stink, I'm taking a shower and then goodnight.

Blue: Poor honey. You rest up.


	3. Library Mayhem

Oh dear, it's been a while hasn't it? Do you all still love me? reviewers nod Phew! That's a relief, long story short, my computer started smoking so I took the back panel off of it and the arm that hold s the hard drive in place melted causing that over heated contents to fall into my lap and onto my hands. Second-degree burns are not fun. So aside from the whole not having a computer and having hands bandaged for a month or so I have o excuse for my absence. I rebuilt my baby and it's back up and running as you can all tell. So I will now be at you, the reviewers, beck and call for a while to repent for my lack of writing.

I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh. End of discussion. No debates. Are you giving me lip?! Are you giving e lip? Go to your room and stay there! I hate when I talk back to myself.

Making Room For New Pairings

Jou dashed into the cafeteria, grabbed a sandwich out of the refrigerator and went to pay for it.

"Hey Jounouchi, what's the rush?" asked Marik as the blonde ran by him.

"It's nothing, I have to go get a book from the library, dat's all, I'm eating with the books today," Jou replied.

Bakura's mouth hung wide open, "Yami check his temperature, I think he's sick. He said he's going to the _library._"

Meanwhile in his own little La la Land Honda is laughing himself senseless. "I think you mean you're going to actually _eat_ the books because the only things he ever reads is comic books!"

"Eat this Honda!"

A book comes flying at Honda and hits him square in the forehead. Yuugi and Ryou drag Honda away to their usual table.

"Bye guys!" Jou runs out of the cafeteria after that. Leaving Yami staring after him. Yami has Anzu adamantly clutching his arm, "C'mon _partner_, lets go get something to eat."

Yami whimpers, "Somebody save me..."

'It's so nice in here.'

Jou liked being in the school library, hardly anyone was ever in here. It had a very cozy atmosphere to it with warm beams of sunlight penetrating in through the windows.

He walked up the aisles of books looking for where 'Romeo and Juliet' would be hiding. Jou walked by sections, Sci-Fi, Biographies, Poetry, Historical... 'Yesh! Found it!'

Jou started searching for 'Shakespeare' in the Classics section. He found that Shakespeare had an entire three shelves. Peering upwards, Jou saw the book he was looking for on the top shelf and reached for it.

'Damn it! Why does the one thing I always want seem to be out of my reach?'

He was thinking of climbing the shelves to get up there.

Jou never noticed the person staring at him from across the library with his head behind a book.

'What is that mutt thinking?' Kaiba thought as he watched Jou see if he could pull himself up to a high shelf.

Then it hit him what Jou was trying to get. 'He's spending his lunch period getting something for our project.' He didn't know why but that touched him in some way.

Kaiba put his book down, heaved himself to his feet and walked up behind Jou and pulled the book down. Jou took the book gratefully, "Thanks man, I never woulda gotten that down with out cha."

"You're welcome pet." Kaiba replied with a scary smile.

"WHOAH!" Jou realized it was Kaiba standing there and backed up into the bookshelf, causing many books to fall down.

"Quiet you're in a library!" Some bat screeched from across the room.

Jou blew a raspberry at said annoying women and went to check the book out.

Kaiba went back to the table he had been occupying and picked his book up again.

He put his book (Ivanhoe) down to grab a bottle of water on the table only to drop his book out of surprise.

Jou sat across from Seto happily munching on his sandwich.

"Pup, what are you doing here?" The brunet asked irritably.

Jou swallowed his mouth of food, "Eating, would you rather I stop?"

He sighed. "No. I meant what are you doing _here_ to be specific."

"Keeping you company. You never eat with anyone, you'll need to go on anti-depressants if you don't talk with nobody."

Kaiba let his head drop on to the table letting it make a 'thud' sound as it hit. "Whatever you want."

"Sounds hollow in there, maybe you need an x-ray to make sure your brain's still in piece" Jou said through a mouthful of food.

'Will I never have rest from him? He's like a bad rash that won't go away sometimes.'

"Or is that a CAT scan?" Jou muttered to no one in particular.

"You're giving me a ginormous headache listening to you so please be quiet for a moment," Kaiba requested, his head still on the table.

"Alright. And ginormous isn't a word."

"It is if I say so."

The blonde started humming the jingle of some food commercial as Kaiba was mulling over his options of what to do with Jou in his head.

"Ah hem."

"Sorry," he stopped humming.

Kaiba had come to a decision. It was all right if the dog stayed as long as he didn't try and talk about stupid things.

"Is that all you have for lunch Kaiba?" he asked.

Both sets of eyes focused on the bottle of water and the orange Kaiba had started peel that lay abandoned at the moment.

"Yeah, I don't like big lunches. And I thought you had an infamous appetite where you'd clear out the snack bar if you skipped breakfast."

"Well you want me to go back and bring back the snack bar I will." Jou stiffly got up and turned around. Wham!

Jou rubbed his head and looked at the floor. Kaiba orange was by his feet and a very smug looking Kaiba not far behind at the table.

"What are you going to do? Throw something back?" Seto arrogantly said thinking he had won another of their squabbles.

Instead he was greeted to a turkey sandwich in the face.

'Katsuya!" Kaiba said through clenched teeth. "You are so going down."

He picked up his calculator from the table and threw it at Jou. Jou ducked and threw a nearby magazine at him. Soon they were throwing the chair cushions at each other along with their textbooks.

"Mr. Jounouchi and Mr. Kaiba! Just what do you think you are doing?!" One of the math sensei's asked the boys.

"Um, fighting?" Jou blankly responds.

"Good work Katsuya, A for effort. Now get out of here you delinquents!" He yells at the two of them as he pushes them out the library doors.

They look at each other for a minute. And then burst out laughing.

The teens walk down the hallway with their arms around each others shoulders for support, laughing as they go.

Their noise brings out many heads of teachers and students wondering what the all the commotion is in the hallway. The hallway they are wandering down happened to be the ninth grade wing.

"I didn't know he could smile."

"Maybe Katsuya got him intoxicated."

"Why would he drink with Katsuya?"

Jou and Kaiba didn't really hear what they were saying. Teachers were giving the two dirty looks while shuffling their pupils back inside.

"Where are you idiots supposed to be?"

"Oh! Sensei Sado," Jou said bowing. "We're s-supposed to be in..."

"Lunch, we were just heading back to the cafeteria right now," Kaiba answered for them. "C'mon Jou." He said and pulling on Jou's sleeve.

The math teacher looked at Kaiba, "And just where is your pass? You can't be walking through the halls without one."

Seto looked to Jou. Jou held up his hands as if to convey 'Why are you looking at me? I never follow school rules.' Kaiba sighed. "We don't have one sir."

Sensei Sado cocked an eyebrow at the two. "Then I guess I'll see you both in detention after school. Three-thirty sharp in room A-2. Don't be late or you'll have detention the rest of the week." Sensei Sado walked away with a satisfied look on his face.

"Mother fucker!" Jou yells as he kicks the wall.

"Well that's one day for our project down the toilet."

Jou rolls his eyes at him, "And I feel so guilty and responsible. I'll have to repent to overcome these feelings of grief."

Seto punched Jou in the shoulder. "Ha ha, I'm almost going to feel bad when I put all the blame on you when we get called to the principles office. And of course I'll get off and you'll be stuck scraping gum off of desks."

Glare. "Nice way to talk to your _friend_ Kaiba. If I go down for being caught without a pass you are going down hard with me." Just then the bell rings dismissing students from their class.

From over the intercom: "... and will the following students please report to the principles office; Sumeragi Subaru, Mibu Kyoshio, Jounouchi Katsuya, Kaiba Seto...

"Well damn that was fast," says Jou.

What will happen on detention? What will their punishment be? Is there actually going to be any yaoi? Will Kaiba actually have an after school on his record?!?

All these and more answered in the next chapter! Apologies for the chapter being shorter than usual. This one was only five pages long while the other two were both seven. I promise to write longer chapters with lots of hot make-out scenes to please the reviewers.

REVIEW AND I'LL WRITE LOTS OF YAOI INTO THE STORY!!


	4. Detention Together

You love me AND you forgive me?! God you guys are the best! bursts into hysterical tears

Kumori Sakusha formerly Saelbu: See, I'm updating!

Crazyrabidfangurl01: I think your dad needs a reality check about how much Generation Y depends on the Internet. We literally fucking breathe it!!

Wow, I've had no idea where this story was going before this. No plot until chapter 4!

Bakura: Shut up.

Marik: No you shut up.

Malik: Both of you shut up.

Ryou: Just say it Bakura.

Bakura: Whatever. Blue Crescent Moon doesn't own Yu-Gi-Oh or anything else mentioned in this story.

Malik: But she does own the story.

Everyone slaps Malik.

Everyone: SHUT UP MALIK!

Making room For New Parings

"Well, we got detention so we might as well skip the rest of our classes for the day."

Kaiba starred at Jou. "You must be kidding me. We just got called to the office and we would have even more detentions and less time to work on our project if we ditch."

Jou waved his finger at Kaiba, "Tsk tsk Kaiba. Pull that unholy stick out of your ass, you're a genius anyway, you can afford to miss a day of school. Word to the wise; of you want to be a delinquent, you have to know how to play the game." He grabbed a cell phone out of his school jacket and called a number on speed dial. "Yo, Honda? This you? Duke?! The fuck are you doing with Honda's phone put him on this minute Dice Boy!"

Kaiba stood to the side and could only hear half the conversation.

"Yah, I need you to have a cover story for me and Moneybags and get our homework. And make it believable this time! No more 'He joined a touring circus as a trapeze artist' crap."

Honda talks to Jou. Jou listens.

"Why am I hanging with Kaiba? Cause I feel like it that's why!"

Honda talks.

"What kind of cover story do I want? Why does that matter? I don't care what you tell those idiots that are our teachers, you can tell them dat I'm blowing Kaiba in the guys shower for all I care!"

Kaiba blushes at the mental image that gave him.

"No you _can't _actually use that as the excuse Honda! Just get our homework for Christ sake it's not rocket science!" click

"I got it covered Kaiba, cause you can count on Jounouchi!" he declares as he points to himself with his thumb.

"Brilliant Mutt, but why are we cutting class again, you're going to fall behind and end up repeating this grade."

"Why Kaiba I didn't know you cared!" Jou bats his eyes at Kaiba and lets out a long dramatic sigh.

"Go play in traffic." Kaiba pushes Jou away by his face.

He stands up and brushes off his uniform, "Lets get out of here."

"And go where?"

"I don't know, isn't one of your thousands of cars from your collection in the parking lot somewhere?" Jou asks.

Again, a dramatic sigh and a roll of the eyes. "No puppy, I get chauffeured here and I'm not supposed to cut class so I can't call for someone to pick us up. You should have thought about that before you called your friend."

The blonde ground his teeth trying to think of a place where they could ditch class and not get caught. "C'mon you overdressed jerk," said Jou giving Kaiba's shirt cuff a slight tug. "We gotta get up to the roof before the bell rings and we're in even more trouble."

Kaiba allowed himself to get dragged up two more flights of stairs before they reached a door with a sign that read: 'Proper Authorization is Required to Access this Area'. "Great work, you led us to a dead end."

"Once again you fail to realize my true genius." Kaiba snorts at this remark and finds it hard to maintain composure.

Whistling a happy tune, Jou pulls out a ring with keys on it, a LOT of keys. He slowly starts to flip through them until he finds what he's looking for. Jo puts a silver key with two teeth into the hole and turns. The door opens.

"Your chariot milady," says Jou and bows low.

Seto growls in the back of his throat. "Knock it off or I'll throw you off the roof."

"Now who's the dog? You don't want to be hasty now, you can't get off the roof without the key either."

His poise recovered, Kaiba seems more focused now. "So, you brought me up here, so what is there to do?"

"I don't know I've used up my capacity of genius for the day, why don't you think of something fun to do?" Jou slumped up against the building where the air conditioners were.

"I hate to disappoint you but I don't do 'fun'."

Seto stood next to the chain link fence that surrounded the roof and gazed down upon the world. The day was immaculately clear, sunny and warm. They could see the small figures down below in gym or mingling during their lunch period. All the trees around the grounds were starting to turn and wither.

"Why not!" Jou whined from behind him. "You do the cold, withdrawn bastard so well, why can't you give your mask a paid vacation for the afternoon? You did in the library."

'So he wants fun does he? I'll give him 'fun'...' ( I think he means 'we')

Kaiba slowly began to unbutton his school jacket and threw it aside so he was standing in only his uniform pants and a white t-shirt. And thus appeared his trademark smirk. He ran straight at Jou and tackled him.

He lay helpless on the ground, "H-hey, that wasn't fair!" yells Jou.

Kaiba holds up his hands as if to say 'so what?' "Who said life was fair?"

"Well then, you won't mind if I'm not a perfect gentlemen to you."

"What?"

And that was all Kaiba knew before he was engaged in a two hour wrestling match on the roof with a certain blonde haired writhing beneath him in various positions that gave Seto's mind so many new dirty thoughts.

When the final bell rang both boys looked as if a gang had jumped them. Seto and Jou each had a black eye, Seto's left and Jou's right. There was a tear down the middle of Kaiba's t-shirt showing off his abs and the cuff had been ripped off of Jou's long sleeve shirt. A bruise was forming on Jou's wrist where Kaiba had held it too tight for too long, Jou had shoved Kaiba and a stray rock had cut his left bicep. Yep, they looked like crap.

Kaiba grabbed his cot and they lugged themselves down the stairs and made their way to classroom A-2. They reached the room without incident, except for Jou tripping down the stairs, and stood in front of the door. 'Now or nothing,' thought Jou.

The honey-eyed teen cautiously slid the door open and walked inside. Empty. There were instructions on the board. "Katsuya and Kaiba, you are to wash this blackboard and then report to the kitchen for pots and pans."

Kaiba bonked Jou on the head. "I'm not an oral learner," he firmly stated.

"But Kaiba the best things in life are given orally," said Jou with a wicked grin. He watched as the Ice Man's cold exterior shattered and he flushed that oh-so-wonderful shade of pink.

"Get stuffed."

"Oh c'mon! It was just a joke Kaiba!" He tossed a bucket at the CEO. "Go fill this up with hot water and come back, I need to go get the rags to wash the board with." Kaiba grumbled a bit and then went to the washroom to fill up the bucket.

Seto walked up the hallway and turned into the men's room and started to fill up the bucket at the sink. He turned his head suspiciously towards the stalls. Strange noises were coming from them. Kaiba turned the tap off and started to look under the doors. He discovered the sound was coming from the fifth and last stall. Kaiba went into the stall next to it stood on the toilet to see who it was. For a moment his eyes bugged out of their sockets. He grinned like an imp, propped his face up in his left hand and balanced the bucket on top of the stall with his right. The tap of the bucket brought the stalls occupants out from their 'activities'. Bakura and Ryou looked up at Kaiba with a hand-caught-in-the-cookie-jar look. "Hi," said Kaiba waving the fingers. "Whoops." He dumped the contents on the bucket top of the two.

"Bloody hell!" Ryou merely offered.

"Kaiba, you might as well have thrown water on a wasps nests," Bakura snarled.

"That would be my cue," and Seto ran out of the bathroom like a bat out of hell and back to A-2 with Bakura hot in pursuit.

"Ah, you're here!" Jou's eyes brightened. "Did you get the water?"

"I did, but there was a incident..."

Bakura threw the door open and walked in sopping wet. "You!" he waved a finger at Kaiba, "Are going to have a nice trip to the Shadow Realm!"

Ryou burst in a moment later and threw himself on Bakura, "Let's discuss this outside."

Ryou closed the door and started to compromise with his Yami. "Don't kill him!"

"What's in it for me?" asked the spirit.

'Whisper whisper'

"On the-!"

"Yes for Christ sake!"

"Done deal!"

The two boys heard the couple running up the hallway. Kaiba had his hands over his face. "I'm scarred for life. I am going to go home after this and inhale household cleaners so I won't remember any of this."

"You're doing it again Kaiba," said Jou.

"What?"

"Over reacting, being a baby, whining, shall I continue?"

Kaiba held out the bucket, "Mutt go get the water and I'll wait here."

Jou got the water and came back to the classroom. They cleaned the board in relative silence until when they were almost done, Katsuya made a discovery while ringing out his rag. He held one end still and spun the other end until it was a tight rope.

"Yooowwww!" Jou whipped Kaiba with the rag-rope.

Kaiba gingerly rubbed his ass. "What was that for you damn stray!"

"The same thing this is for!" Jou continued to assault Kaiba with the rag until he got pinned up against the wall.

"Enough is enough." Kaiba grabbed the rag out of Jou's hand and threw it somewhere.

"Kaiba let me go!" Jou whimpered afraid of what he would do to him.

"Or you'll what?" Kaiba smirked.

"I'll...I'll..." Katsuya found his balls somewhere in the deep recesses of his stomach and leaned forward. His smashed his lips against Kaiba's and pressed his hips into the taller boy's.

Kaiba was dumbfounded. Slack jawed and unblinking he stood there.

"We're done with the boards now we need to do pots and pans."

See! I made them kiss! You love me now cause you know it's going to do nothing but get hotter! See you at the next chapter update. Keep reviewing.

Next chapter has a name 'Spork Suicide' keep reading to find out!


	5. I Kill You With a Spork!

If this chapter gets mushy or sappy or sentimental, don't blame me, BLAME THE MUSIC! I'm listening to a song called 'Cry for Me my Lover' it's all instrumental and I'm practically moved to tears. I also just realized that I called Otogi Duke last chapter. I have lapses sometimes between localized and Japanese names. I also want to say that I changed my title from 'Spork Suicide' to... just read the chapter.

Current Music: Cry for Me My Lover

Marik: She is such a wimp.

Ryou: clutches teddy bear I don't know... I think it's great that she is in touch with her feelings...

Marik: Shut your face you pansy assed, British wimp!

Enter Bakura: holds up sword Your ass is mine!

Marik: sing-song Anytime, anywhere, at my house or at the fair!

Enter Malik: O.o I'm leaving. And since they aren't going to get to it, Blue Crescent Moon doesn't own Yu-Gi-Oh. Or else the men in white jackets and syringes that took Carrie away would come for her.

Bakura: I'd come for her!

Malik: hits Bakura with newspaper Down boy! You're supposed to be gay!

Marik: Why is this chapter called Spork Suicide?

Everyone slaps Marik

Everyone: SHUT UP MARIK!

Marik: I will not!

Blue: ****kicks Marik in the ass Happy birthday.

Komori Sakusha formerly Saelbu: Aw, thanks. But give my beta Carrie a bit of credit too.

KC: Much love goes out to you.

Pickle-kitten: o.O; Carrie! Why the hell didn't you catch something like that!?

Carrie: flips through pages I don't read every story out there and you get most of your humor from 'Humorous Tidbits for Growing Authors', so don't blame me! hides under crazyrabidfangurl's Rock

Velvetina: I am and I will.

Crazyrabidfangurl01: Yes but it's been changed to Spork Seppuku, why? Because I said so. And it sounds cooler.

Miru Amai: The creative mill is working at full capacity, so fear not for more chapters!

Badkitty: Unfortunately there's something called a plot bunny I have and the man on man might not come as fast as you want. oo,

Making Room For New Pairings; Subtitle: Spork Seppuku

"C'mon you doofus," Jou said and once again began pulling Kaiba along by the sleeve.

He led them to the kitchen and donned an apron and a hairnet. "Kaiba get this shit on unless you want your uniform ruined."

"Whatever, you're the master of detention."

Jou had a huge grin on his face, "Dat's right Kaiba! I'm the master and you're the mutt."

Kaiba slapped his hand to his face; he fell right into that one. "I'm getting the apron on now shut up all ready!"

Jou whistled at Kaiba once he had both hairnet and apron on. "Woo! Gonna make the cover of Vogue with that! C'mon shake those money makers girl!"

Seto banged his head repeatedly on the counter, "What did I do in a past life to deserve this?"

"You were a nasty magician in ancient Egypt that planned to overthrow the pharaoh and take over the world," Jou offered.

"Oh, I must have forgot that," he sarcastically replied.

"Get to work with these pots Kaiba and I'll start scrubbing the pans."

They worked at the sinks washing until their hands were wrinkled and decided to take a break for a while. "Kaiba, I think I just found us our payback," Jou said from across the kitchen as he was bending in the fridge.

Kaiba walked over behind him and tried o see around Jou so he could know what he was so adamantly starring at. "Move your ego inflated head pup so I can see."

Jou sidestepped to let him see. There was a late with a big hunk of chocolate cake on it with a name tag that read 'SADO' on it in bold letters.

"I don't know about you but I feel like going on a chocolate binge now," Jou said practically drooling.

"I don't think that's a good idea mutt..." Just then Kaiba's stomach decided to announce it's hunger to the world with a loud growl. "Okay maybe it is. I'll get something for us to eat with."

They sat on top of the counter each with a spork in hand, munching on the detention-assigning Sensei Sado's cake. When the piece was almost gone Jou took the opportunity to lick the frosting off of his fingers.

Seto turned to ask Jou if he was done and nearly fell off the counter. 'Oh. My. Dog. Is he trying to make me molest him in the kitchen or something?'

"See something you like?" asked Jou.

"Yeah, it was this image of your face hitting the tile."

"Wha-?"

Kaiba seizes the moment and shoves Jou off the counter onto his butt.

"Oh man, that was the wrong thing to do right now you snot!" Jou seethes and yells at Kaiba. He lunges towards him with the spork in hand and is trying to stab him with it.

And just then the door happens to be thrown open. "Aibou, I don't see why you won't join a sport." Enter stage left: Yuugi, Yami, and Ryou walk into kitchen.

"I'm small and I bruise easily."

"Then be on the gymnastics team."

Yami promptly punched Ryou in the shoulder, "And _you_, why aren't _you _in a sport?" he asks. Yuugi snickers. "What's so funny Aibou?"

"He doesn't like the locker room. Actually, I wouldn't either if I had white hair _down there_!" Yami's eyes bug out of their sockets, "Forget I asked."

It was only after that that they noticed Jou attempting to kill Kaiba with a spork. "Jou, what are you doing?"

Jou stares at the trio. "Ack! I've been caught, in order to conceal my master's name I now commit spork seppuku!" He puts the spork against his stomach and makes it appear he thrust it into his gut.

Kaiba seems to care nothing for Jou's act and questions the intruders. "What are you doing here, Ryou? I thought you had some important business to do with Bakura."

"Uh, yeah, well about that..." Ryou stutters out while turning six shades of red.

"Great to know, Mutt are finished here?"

Reanimated and sitting up Jou responds. "Yeah, but I wouldn't suggest walking around outside with a hairnet on."

Kaiba took the hairnet and threw it at Jou. "Whatever, I need to go into work." The brunet grabbed his jacket and promptly exited the room.

Yuugi blew a raspberry at the door as it slammed shut. "Asshole."

"Language," Yami said starring at his light.

Jou rolled his eyes, "Oh please, like you haven't said it before. And you three don't have to work with him on a project."

Yami poked a finger at Jou; "I have Anzu for my partner! Anzu! Do you know how many times she calls me? Or for how long she talks for?" Jou did see that Yami's eyes were even redder then would be normal.

"Unhook the phone, and sleep more 'cause your iris seems to be encroaching on the white of your eye," Jou turned Yami's head to the side and saw that his eyes were all bloodshot.

"I have Malik for a partner," Ryou added.

Everyone glares.

"I'll shut up." Eyes avert back to Yami.

"Okay, I'll won't talk to her for a while." Yuugi hugs Yami making Yami blush uncontrollably.

"Well yer happy Yuge, I thought you had Bakura for a partner," Jou stood there scratching his head.

"Well I do but we're doing our project on 'The Three Musketeers' and I let him play with swords most of the time so it's not bad." Yuugi smiled, "Then he ran into the next room where Ryou was reading, picked him up, threw him over his shoulder and declared that he would save the fair maiden."

Yami and Jou look at the albino. "What! Yuugi gave him soda, he was excited and needed to run around."

"You talk like he's a dog."

"He acts like one," Ryou said, "Therefore I refer to him as one."

Instead of going to the Kaiba Corp. building like he told Jou would be. He went home to see his little brother.

"Mokuba, I'm home!" The echoes rebounded off the walls. "Kuba? Are you home?"

"Big brother! You're home early, nothing's wrong is it?" Mokuba's concerned face stared up at him.

"No, everything is all right. I just came home because I didn't want to go into work after detention," Kaiba told him slumping down on a couch in the family room.

"Wow! You got detention, whaddya do?" Mokuba sat down next to him on the couch.

"I got caught out of class without a pass."

"Aww, that's lame, why couldn't you do something cool to get detention?"

Kaiba shoved him farther down the couch so he could lie down. Which inevitably meant he was sitting on the arm to accommodate Kaiba's long legs. "If you had let me finish you would have heard me say that I cut class for the rest of the day afterwards."

"Awesome! Will you play chess with me later tonight?" Mokuba asked smiling.

'Oh god, it's the eyes, those freakin' puppy dog eyes.' "Of course I'll play with you. You won't win, but I'll play with you." Kaiba gave his brother a genuine smile. "But right now I want to sleep, wake me up when you want to play, k?"

"Sure Seto!" With that said the raven-haired boy went bouncing upstairs to his room.

7:30 a.m. Tuesday morning.

Kaiba awoke with an unfamiliar weight on him. Eyes blinked open and saw a mass of blackness enshrouding his vision. He sat up and saw Mokuba had curled up on top of him in fetal position with a comforter over both of them. "Hey Moki, wake up we have school today." He didn't realize how adorable they looked lying there like that.

"Do we haff to?" His brother at up wiped at his eyes to get the sleepies out.

"Yeah, now hurry up. School is in an hour and you," Kaiba sniffed at the air, "Need a shower."

Mokuba jumped up with his hands on his hips. "Oh right, you're the horny teenager and you need a shower because you sweat a lot."

Kaiba reluctantly got up and heard all the joints in his back crack. 'That's what I get for sleeping on the couch,' he thought as he stretched.

"Jou are we going to work on the project today or are we getting detention again today?" Kaiba asked as he sat down in his seat.

"I was thinking detention again."

Kaiba put down the business section he was reading and looked at him, "What were you thinking?" He said with a snort.

"I was thinking that we could run down the halls naked and sing German opera," Jou said grinning the entire time.

Kaiba let his head drop into his hands. "Do you ever wonder what life would be like if you had had enough oxygen at birth?"

There's another chapter down for you!

Marik: Woman! I've brought my lawyer!

Fine, if you would kindly step onto the X first though.

Marik: steps on X

Carrie if you would do the honour?

Carrie: Most certainly. flips switch

Everyone watches as Marik goes flying into the distance with his lawyer.

Yuugi: plays bagpipes for the occasion

Judges?

Malik: 9.5

Ryou: 8.9

Oh, and a six from the Russian judge!

Bakura: The hell are you smoking? I'm not Russian!

ooc: no offense to any Russian readers that's just what my friends say.


	6. Some Alone Time

Blue's notes: I smell chili...

Bakura: Or maybe your clothes that you've been sitting in for the last three days! You wore them all weekend, slept in them then rolled out of bed and wore them to school!

Blue: -.- That could _also_ be it.

Malik: is painting toenails I think it's just her socks.

Carrie: is typing this Just dump body spray over yourself and you'll be fine.

Blue: All right, what is it? Why are you suddenly interested in my body odor?

Ryou: I'm not sure, but Blue Crescent Moon and Carrie Fernandez do not own Yu-Gi-Oh.

Carrie: That was random.

Ryou: You wrote it!

Carrie: Damn right I did! And I'm also writing this, look! (") ( ") (") ( ") It's Kirby Bust-a-Move!

Malik: Blue, load the catapult. We've got another one.

Carrie: My Kirby's didn't come out right! The arms are missing! Damn... Oh well.

Bakura: This story still doesn't have any plot...

Malik: Scratch that; make that order two to go.

Reviewer time! You know I love you all!

Miru Amai: Yes, I know, I always pictured Kaiba with a loving tender side.

Crazyrabidfangurl01: Yeah Carrie, listen to your friends stay away from her rock! ??? I actually have no clue what so ever as to what they're talking about.

Kumori Sakusha formerly Saelbu: I'm updating and I will continue to do so!

Velvetina: I know, I know, I know! That was maybe my favorite part of that chapter!

i-love-bakura1489: I'm writing woman, keep yer pants on! Lol, rotflmaorolling on the floor, laughing my ass off, right?

Lady Fiore – Ami Metallium: It's coming... slowly, but it is.

Celestial Psyche: I'm working on my grammar and spelling and all the other junk you mentioned, and don't worry! You're not being mean, you're being helpful and critiquing my errors. With the kiss, it's supposed to be like it happened and now they're either too embarrassed to talk about it, discuss it, or be mature about it. The first two chapters? Yeah that sounds right, is before I had Carrie retyping this for me, that's why the formatting is crap. Kaiba's... a bit ooc in this, if I want I'll just say he's schizophrenic and has personality lapses, it's supposed to be that he doesn't feel he can trust Jou's friend, thus the icy mask. About the 'Spork Suicide' thing, Carrie or me must of put that 'cause it's 'Spork Seppuku'. It was 1) a feature in my humor magazine and 2) dates back to Carrie's history when her and her friends put on a murder play. It's kind of an inside joke.

Felidae: I'm glad you enjoyed it!

Making Room For New Pairings; subtitle: We've Been like This Before

After school Tuesday.

"Get over here dog," Kaiba ordered. They were sitting in the library again and it's after school. Kaiba was typing away at a school computer.

"Go take a long walk off a short dock," Jou told him sitting down next to him.

"Then you'll drown to because I'll have taken you out on the leash."

Eye twitch. Jou makes a move to take the keyboard and gets his hand smacked away by Kaiba's. "Bad. No. Down."

Again, his hand gets slapped away as he goes to relieve Kaiba of the keyboard. Jou jumps on him in an attempt to gain control of the computer that was logged in.

"Down dumb dog." He said and threw Jou back into his seat; he cast Jou a regretful glance and continued what he was doing at the computer station. "We need to work."

"On what?" He whined.

"Well, you can write up the summary of the book, and when your down with that I'll type it up and we'll have our oral done."

Jou let his mind wander, 'Mmm, oral. He doesn't know how many good thoughts that brings to surface.' A smile spread across Jou's face as he spaced out.

"Wake up Katsuya!" Kaiba snapped his fingers in front of his face.

"But why do you have to type it?" He asked, "Typing is easier."

"Well, typing is easier, but you have to do some of the mental think work involved in this project. That and I type twice as fast as you do." A smug grin worked its way onto his features.

Jou sat next to Kaiba writing out what happened in which act on note cards. Jou was feeling miffed about Kaiba being a cold nasty jerk to him when his friends showed up. And Katsuya Jounouchi never liked being ignored. "Kaiba."

Kaiba continues typing.

"Kaiba."

Still be ignored.

"Kaiba, Pegasus is here in a bright blue Speedo and wants to marry you. He's got the rock and everything."

Kaiba: O.o

Jou snickered at his comment. Kaiba went to swivel the chair around but put too much force into and fell backwards. He lay on the floor in a very undignified sprawl and glared at Jou. "That's not funny."

"Sure it is. If you were me you'd think it's hilarious, but seeing as you aren't I can understand why you wouldn't find it funny," Jou sat with his feet on the keyboard counter drinking a soda.

"You don't know how many rules you're breaking by simply being in the lab with me," Kaiba said getting back into his chair. "You've got my attention, now what is it you want?"

"I'm done with the summary," he offered.

Kaiba's face brightened. "That's great, let me see it." Jou handed Kaiba the note cards. "Pup, no offense, but there are nothing but drawings on these."

"They're on the other side."

"Oh," Kaiba flipped them over and started reading them. Then he started typing them up, hands blazing across the keyboard. "I'm done with this."

Jou perked up and looked at Kaiba, "That was fast."

"I know, most things I do are fast."

'Mmm, fast and furious I hope... Katsuya! Mind out of the gutter, focus!' "Yeah, what's the other part of the project we're supposed to do?"

Kaiba pulls a palm pilot out of his pocket and starts poking it with his pencil. "We're also supposed to do a comparison of the book to another one of the author's books, so pick which one of Shakespeare's plays to compare it too."

"Uh, A Midsummer Nights whatever it is, how bout that?" Jou questioned.

"That would be dream, A Midsummer Nights Dream."

"That's the one!" Jou said excitedly. "I haven't read it though."

Kaiba starred at him. "Do you have any idea what it's about?"

Spotlight's on Jou, what will his answer be? "A dream, on a midsummer night?" Oh, and he blows it big time.

Kaiba rolls his eyes, "You will know shortly then, we're going to my place so get your stuff."

"Okay," Jou runs around the computer lab getting of his belongings. He heads towards the door and waits for Kaiba.

Kaiba picks up Jou's note cards and turns them over. He walks to the door, "Jou what is this supposed to be?"

"Well that's the Flame Swordsman," he points to one figure. "And that's the Blue Eyes White Dragon," he pointed to the other.

"And what exactly are they doing?"

Jou points to the Flame Swordsman, "He's hacking up the Blue Eyes."

Eye twitch. "Okay we're going."

At Kaiba Mansion

"Seto, you brought Jou home with you!"

Jou and Kaiba had both tactfully side stepped The Amazing Flying Mokuba as they entered this time. "I did. We'll be in the library if you need us."

Mokuba sulked, "Oh, I thought you were here to do something fun..."

"Well you thought wrong." He grabbed Jou by the elbow, "Lets go, unless that is you want more 'hand banging' good memories to remember my house by."

"I'm coming, keep yer shirt on."

Jou followed Kaiba down a different hallway then the one he remembered coming down before. He was so lost in thought that he didn't realize Kaiba had stopped resulting in him running into the brunet. Kaiba grunted as the blonde bumped into him but opened the door to his private library. His library was easily the size of the school's but with books of much higher intelligence.

"I have to say Kaiba, the more I see of your pad, the more I never want to leave," Jou said gawking at the books jammed floor to ceiling..

Cue Kaiba blush. "Thanks, I like my house too. Would you like me to get you a copy of A Midsummer Night's Dream?"

"Yes! Fetch me a book faithful, wife of mine!" Jou chirped.

Biting the inside of his cheek, Kaiba replied, "Don't push it."

He gave Jou a copy of the book and they went to sit at Kaiba's desk.

Jou looked at the first page.

'_Thesus. Now, fair Hippolyta, our nuptial hour_

_Draws on apace; four happy days bring in _

_Another moon: but, O, methinks...'_

"This is going to be a _long_ read," Jou mumbled to himself.

An hour and a half later.

_'Puck. If we shadows have offended,_

_Think but this, and all is mended-_

_That you have slum'red here_

_While these visions did appear._

_And this weak and idle theme,_

_No more yielding but a dream,_

_Gentles, do not reprehend._

_If you pardon we will mend._

_And, as I am an honest Puck,_

_If we have unearned luck_

_Now tp scape the serpent's tongue,_

_We will make amends ere long;_

_Else the Puck a liar call._

_So, good night unto you all._

_Give me your hands, if we be friends,_

_And Robin shall restore amends.'_

'Oh god do my eyes hurt!' Jou set the book down and looked at a conveniently placed clock. "Wow, it's only 6:30," Jou said to nothing at all as Kaiba was engrossed in another book. "Something is different about you," Jou said when Kaiba put his book down.

He rolled his eyes. "What could I have possibly done while you were reading?"

Jou snapped his fingers in understanding, "You're wearing glasses!"

"Yes puppy, I'm wearing my reading glasses." 'He's doing that annoying pout again! Jou always does that around me!'

Jou was sitting back in his chair tipping it back on two legs, "Den how come you don't wear them at school? I know you read all the time, if the lesson is boring at school you sit there just reading a book all class."

"Uh, well, I'm supposed to but... I don't," he blankly replied.

Jou plopped his chair down on the ground and looked at Kaiba, "You don't like your glasses?"

"No."

"I could be wrong, but I think somebody needs a hug."

"Jou, what are you thinking?" Jou was coming around the desk to Kaiba.

"Well hugs make you happy, and having glasses make you not happy, therefore I'm going to hug you." Jou hugged Kaiba around his shoulders. Kaiba instinctively burrowed against the top of Jou's head. "I'm going to make you an appointment at my family's optometrist and we'll go and get you contacts. We can go together. Sound like a plan?"

Seto stiffened at the sound of the word 'optometrist' but relaxed again when he said 'we'. "I'd like that a lot."

Jou looked up to smile at Kaiba, "You know I think we've been like this before."

"Not exactly," Kaiba said, a certain spark flaming in his eyes.

"What's that suppos-"Jou was cut off as Kaiba snaked his arms around Jou's waist pulled him closer. "Mmm, a change for the better I'd say."

One of Kaiba's hands left its position at Jou's waist to play with some of the golden blonde hair. "Do you need a ride home?"

"I guess, are you offering?" Jou asked, not wanting to shatter the moment of intimacy that was slipping away.

"Yes, but I don't want to go yet."

"Why not?" Jou breathed over Kaiba's long neck.

He stroked Jou's hair again, "Because it feels just gorgeous to have you in my arms," he sighed.

"How good?"

"This good." Kaiba puts his hand under Jou's chin so he was looking at him. His arms wrapped around Jou's waist and pulled him up close to his face and kissed Jou. Jou was already in such a relaxed state of mind that he leaned into the kiss and languidly kissed back. The need for air over same the two and they broke apart for air.

"That good?"

"That good," Kaiba replied.

In front of Jou's apartment building

Jou and Seto stood in front of the doors to Jou's apartment building looking at each other playfully bantering.

"Can I give you a pet name?"

"No."

"How 'bout tori?"

"No."

"Or neko?"

"No!"

"Can I call you Seto then?"

"Yes, whenever you want."

The two kissed briefly before Kaiba pulled back to allow Jou to go inside. "I'll see you tomorrow Jou."

"Yes, and soon you'll have contacts for your big, beautiful, blue eyes," Jou added.

"Yeah."

Jou shut the door as Kaiba walked away. 'That was not enough for me to thrive on for the rest of the night,' Jou thought as he touched his lips with his finger tips.

Oh! Me so evil! Teasing you like this, but Carrie loves you!

Bakura: And you don't?

Blue: No, I only like them a lot. And if you have a problem with that we can remove you by force.

Malik: whispersDude, shut up. She's started aiming for billboards with that thing now.


	7. Mind Fucked Ryou

Carrie: Da da da dum!

Ryou: Da da da dum!

Carrie: No, only I can do that.

Ryou: _whines _Why?

Carrie: Because I need to test out my bottle rockets on something bigger than a Furby.

Ryou: 0.o Bakura. Help. Now.

Bakura: _is sleeping in teddy jammies_

Ryou: -.-; Lot of help he is...

Bakura _starts to talk in his sleep_: BCM and Carrie don't own Yu-Gi-Oh...

Blue: Maybe we should put a bell on him in case he starts to sleep walk.

_Everybody slaps Blue_.

Everybody: SHUT UP BLUE!

-------------------

Lady Fiore – Ami Metallium- Thank you very much. "(I know... it's short... but I'm VERY tired...)" That's exactly how I feel!

Crazyrabidfangurl01- I won't even try and comprehend just let Carrie puzzle it out...

Kumori Sakusha formerly Saelbu- I'm glad I made you happy.

Celestial Psyche- This update isn't exactly soon... but close enough!

Pickle-kitten- I forgive you? Not sure what you did, but you are a O-K in my book!

Caecuslupa- I glad you have patience, 'cause with me you need lots!

Scoodoo58- You flatter me, but honestly, for a REALLY great story try I Know You're Out There Somewhere, by: Firewing. Only I'd suggest reading it on aff.

Just to clarify some things, it's about mid to late October in the story. Yay! I get to play mind games with Ryou! And Jou gets to act semi-dominant!

------------------------

Making Room For New Pairings

Wednesday morning, Kaiba Mansion

"Mokuba, do I look all right?"

"Why?"

"Just answer the question!"

Mokuba rolled his eyes, "You look fine, like you do every day. Is there some reason that you want to look better than normal?"

"Uh..." A light tinge appeared high on Kaiba's cheeks.

His devilish little brother grinned, "Can I have three guesses?"

Kaiba was doomed to his fate any way so he agreed.

"Do you have a business meeting after school?"

Head shake, no.

"Is it school picture day?"

Head shake, no.

And as if the answer suddenly came to him... "I know! You're trying to catch Jou's attention!"

Seto sighed and patted his little brother on the head fondly, "Remind me why I let you walk all over me?"

"Because some day I'm going to be your vice president and you have to get used to me being a know-it-all smart ass."

"That's it, no more caffeine for you!"

"Pah! Like you know where I keep the good brews."

Before Lunch, Wednesday

Kaiba walked to the cafeteria with a gentle smile playing on his face. Girls had been squealing when they saw him smiling as he strode down the hallway. 'They think I'm smiling because of them?! Not likely...' Kaiba thought to himself.

Him and Jounouchi had been shooting each other glances all through the classes that they shared together, which were numerous.

Kaiba was dragged away from his thoughts as he was tugged behind the staircase where the vending machines were.

"What the h-" He was silenced as he saw Jou standing there.

"Hello Seto!" Jou said, his grin matching Kaiba's. "Miss me as much as I missed you?"

Kaiba rolled his eyes, "You saw me five minutes ago."

"Yeah, but five minutes ago I couldn't do this." Jou sealed his lips over Kaiba's in a hungry manner, his hands going to the brunet's hips and backing them towards the wall for balance.

Kaiba pulled away, "Katsuya, we can't do this here. Someone might see us here."

Jounouchi spoke into Kaiba's ear, "But isn't it exciting? Knowing that you could be caught at any time? By any one?" He licked the shell of Kaiba's ear and sucked on the lobe. The taller boy moaned out loud as he did this. Kaiba wasn't sure what it was, but the thought of having one of his peers catch him making out with Jounouchi thrilled him to no end.

The two remained there for a good ten minutes energetically kissing each other. But then, (of course) someone came around the corner looking to get something out of the vending machine. Ryou, innocent little Ryou, had come waltzing around the corner drinking out of his water bottle to only promptly spit it back onto the ground. "W- w- what are you guys doing?"

Ryou had came from the lunchroom to get some Chex mix out of the vending machine only to find Kaiba-kun slammed up against the wall, his hands sifting through Jounouchi's hair, and his tongue down Jounouchi's throat. So he did what any other sane kid his age would do, calmly asked them how this came about. Sure he did... That's what he would have done if he weren't totally freaked.

Now, back to reality.

"Aaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!! Oh my god, my eyes! They burn!" He ran into the cafeteria and over to Yuugi and the gang were all eating.

"What's wrong with you man?" asked Honda.

"By the vending machines, it was, only to say, sweet mother of us all, HORRIBLE!"

Yami put a hand on Ryou's shoulder, "Calm down, and then tell us what this is about."

The white haired teen took a deep breath and let it out.

"Now what did you see by the vending machine that was so horrible?" Yami questioned.

"He probably saw a mouse," snickered Marik. Bakura hits him in the head with a bologna sandwich.

"I saw Kaiba and Jou making out by where they keep the vending machines!" Ryou told them.

Yami: O.O

"Oh they'll be so cute together!" said Anzu enthusiastically. "I wonder if Jounouchi will move in with him?"

"Whoa! My best friend is NOT moving in with that heartless jerk!" Honda declares slamming his fist on table.

Yuugi tries to get everyone under control. "Why don't we just go and ask Jou if he's really serious about Kaiba or if he's only messing with him. It could be some kind of joke."

Everybody got up and walked to where the vending machines are kept behind one of the flights of stairs. No one is there.

Bakura glares at Ryou, "If this is a desperate cry for attention, you've got mine."

"I swear they were just here less then two minutes ago!" Ryou whimpers.

Otogi puts his arm around Bakura. "Listen, between you and me, if Ryou came up with something as ridiculous as that he's obviously got one thing on his mind. Maybe you should just take him home and bugger him..."

"My hikari is not lying!" Bakura fumed. "If he says he say Jou and Kaiba necking then he did!"

Meanwhile...

Kaiba and Jou sat at the top of the stairs listening to them argue, laughing into their shirtsleeves all the while.

"That was amusing!" Kaiba tells Jou.

Jou smirks and kisses Kaiba on the nose, "I know, so maybe we should continue our little mind game with Ryou?"

"You are wicked beyond all belief, putting your amusement before your friends mental health... you'd make a good business partner."

"Is that a proposition?"

Snort. "Like hell."

Ryou was getting paranoid. For the rest of the week where ever he went he'd see Kaiba and Jou touching each other, and the creepy thing was he'd turn his back for five seconds and then they were gone. He was starting to think that the others were right and he should seek professional help.

Bakura was also at the end of his rope. His hikari was freaking out if he came up behind him or tapped him on the back. He was determined to prove that Jou and Kaiba really were a couple and no one was going to stop him. Bakura started following Ryou around where ever he went. Ryou called him a stalker, but hell, that's one more career to put on his resume. He was starting to think his friends were right and he should call in a shrink for Ryou.

"Seto, I don't think we can mess with Ryou any more. Bakura has been following him."

"Does that mean I can't hold you around school?"

"I don't know, do you want the whole world to know about us?"

"..."

"Seto?"

"Hmmm..."

"Kuro Neko-sama!"

"Damn it! I told you not to call me that!" Sigh. "No, not yet. I just want some privacy in my life for once. The media has always been on the look out for juicy celebrity gossip and you would be it."

"Chill man, it's cool," Jou said as toyed with Kaiba's hair. Jou was sitting on Kaiba's lap in his apartment. It was Saturday and his father was gone for the night and he had invited Seto over.

Jou got to witness a rare moment in history; his boyfriend was wearing jeans and a t-shirt.

"Well I think you're almost suitable to take out in public," Jou told him.

"I don't know what you are talking about, I'm always presentable," Kaiba argued with him.

Jou rolled his eyes and smiled, "Shut up and eat your pretzels." He stuffed a couple of pretzels in Kaiba's mouth.

Seto chewed thoughtfully before talking, "I'm glad you're going to feed me, but you promised me a movie," he added a pout for effect.

"You could have the world with that look."

"But you forget I already have the world and then some," he laughed light-heartedly.

'He's deprived the world of a beautiful laugh,' Jou thought. He put 'A Knight's Tale' in the DVD player and turned the lights off. He jumped over the back of the couch and curled up next to Seto.

Kame Game Shop, Saturday Night

Yuugi, Malik, Ryou, and Honda were playing a role-playing game in the back while Yami and Otogi were talking to Grandpa about Duel Monsters strategies, and Marik and Bakura were poking Honda asking him why his character was wearing a skirt.

"It's not a skirt, it's a tunic!" Honda yelled at the two ancient spirits sitting behind him.

Bakura and Marik continue to poke Honda. Ryou nudges Malik and puts two ten-sided dice in his hand. "Malik, it's your turn," he reminds him.

"I know, we need Jou here though. I don't like cheap knock offs instead of the real thing," he points to Honda.

Yuugi nods reluctantly, "Honda's just not the same as Jou and he doesn't play as well either." Honda sat by and grumbled and complained as everyone ignored his presence.

"If I'm not good enough to play your game with you why don't you go get him at his apartment!" Honda fumed at them.

Everyone's eyes lit up. "That's a great idea! Jou told me he was feeling kind of bushed and said he was just going home to crash," Yuugi tells them.

Honda seems considerably less angry now that he's been told what a good idea he came up with. "I've got the spare to Jou's apartment so we can let ourselves in if he's got his crazy rock music blaring off the walls," grin, "Which he will."

"Alright then, let us go get Jou so Yuugi actually stands a chance against us," Ryou declares. Malik gives him a high five.

All four of them got their coats and shoes on to make the ten-minute walk to Jou's apartment. Yami and Otogi elected to stay behind to continue talking with Grandpa, and Marik and Bakura stayed behind to bother Yami and Otogi.

Yami shot a warning glance at the two other yami's in the room. "I better be able to here your voices at all times," he told them.

Bakura stood up from the game board, "Then I guess we better talk REALLY loud!" he laughed.

Outside Jou's apartment

Yuugi knocked at the door three times before waiting for an answer.

"No man, it's gotta be loud enough for that knuckle head to hear you. Like this!" He slammed his fist into door a couple of times before stopping to hear if Jou was coming. He obviously wasn't. "That's alright, 'cause I have my handy dandy notebook! I mean key!" Honda grabbed a small key with a silver finish out and put it in the lock.

The four quietly moved inside to the apartment listening for any noise. They took off their shoes before looking around for signs of life.

"That's odd," Honda scratched his head, "There's no head banger music being played."

"There he is! The idiot fell asleep on the couch," Malik pointed into the living room.

They walked in and saw the DVD logo bouncing around the screen and his hair could be seen peeking around the armrest of the couch. Malik went over and tapped Jou on the head because he was sleeping face down and a blanket pulled up to his neck.

"Nnn...?" Was the only answer he received.

"Jou, wake up!" Ryou says.

Jou shifted on the couch under the blanket, "What are you talking about Mr. Jounouchi? Katsuya is on the other end..."

All four jaws dropped as Malik pulled the blanket back. Oh, would you look at that, it's Kaiba. And indeed when they looked at the other side they say Jou snoozing with his feet stretched out by Kaiba's chest.

Honda grit his teeth in frustration and confusion, "Jou! Would you wake up!"

Jou sat up and rubbed his eyes, "Is it morning so soon?" He blinked and looked around, "Why are you guys here?"

"What are we doing here?! What is he doing here?!" Honda exploded and pointed to Kaiba.

"Having a sleep over, what does it look like?" The blonde replied groggily.

A look of realization dawned on Ryou. "Ah ha! You two really are a couple and I'm not insane!"

"Or maybe you are. Me and Kaiba are just friends." Jou kicked Kaiba in the stomach so he woke up.

"What was that for?" His voice was somewhat muffled by his pillow.

"Didn't you hear? We're entertaining," came Jou's sarcastic reply, accented by another kick to his thigh at the end.

Kaiba rolled over to see the four stooges perched over him. "I'm going to close my eyes and when I open them in five seconds, I want all of you at least three feet away from me." He closed his eyes and when he opened them they had all done as he had said. "Now what is this all about?"

"We all think you're dating Jou," Yuugi told him.

Both boys on the couch quirked an eyebrow at them and then burst out laughing.

Malik, Yuugi, and Ryou all angrily eyed Honda. "Great idea coming over here."

Honda looks confused, "What did I do?"

Yuugi looked back towards Jou, "So you probably don't want to come back to the game shop with us?"

Jou abruptly stopped laughing, "Nah, I'll pass tonight, but thanks for asking."

The quartet made to leave from the apartment. "You guys really aren't together?" Malik questioned again.

"No." They answered in unison.

All of them left and left Jou and Kaiba alone. Kaiba tenderly kisses Jou on the cheek, "If you can fool your closest friends you can fool a reporter."

"I know, lets go back to sleep." Jou lays down next to Kaiba on the floor with a pillow and the blanket. Kaiba's arms immediately went around his waist and pulled him close.

Jou started to say, "I've been thinking..." But Seto cut him off.

"Don't think now, just sleep."

----------------------------------------

Blue: And I'm out! Guess what happens next chapter? Jou's dad comes home! The drama, the suspense, what will Jou's dad say?

Bakura: That you're a bad actor.

Blue: Nice teddy jammies loser.

Bakura: _runs into the horizon_

Ryou: We kind of need him for the plot...

Carrie: Who the hell said there was a plot?

Plot: I say that there will be lots of hot man on man action in the next chapter.

_Seto high fives plot_

Seto: Woohoo! I'm finally going to get some in this story!

Blue: Not if I have anything to say about it. _shreds plot _I've got this mapped out, you just wait for the lemon. "If Blue gives you a lemon, the lemonade will flow freely."

Carrie: Peace out!


	8. Goodbye Mr Jounouchi, Hello Breakfast

Blue: Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Carrie: You know this probably isn't going to be up in time for Thanksgiving, right?

Blue: Will you shut up?

-crickets chirp-

Blue: Where are the muses, Carrie?

Carrie: _nervous eye dart_ I have no idea what you're talking about…

Blue: Carrie! What have you done with my muses woman!

Carrie: I, uh, _Blue holds up a rolled up newspaper_ Okay, okay! I sold them on Ebay!

Blue: You did what!!

Carrie: More like traded them in…

_Door bell sounds_, Carrie runs for it and sees four large boxes on her doorstep-

From inside box: Blue and Carrie do not own Yu-Gi-Oh, nada, zilch, zip.

Blue: Who'd you get?

Carrie: Otogi, Honda, Shizuka, and Anzu! Since I got Anzu, I also get a complimentary crossbow and laser scope! Release the hounds!

------------

This is the part where Carrie plays secretary for me!

Crazyrabidfangurl01: -Carrie whacks her with paper fan- Stay in your seat woman! I'll pass out the lemonade when I feel like it!

Miru Amai: I know how ya feel, I feel the same way, only better because it's my story! XP I'm just playing with you.

Cozmic-Gal: Thanks! I'll keep updating!

Kenshinfan21: I hope you like Jou's dad's reaction!

Kumori Sakusha formerly Saelbu: I'll take it that you liked the chapter, ne?

Mandapandabug: No rushing the authors! We love writing but it takes time, so be patient, Blue might get a cramp and start whining.

Celestial Psyche: I'm glad the after talk is funny, I get to write it!

A note, I don't remember what Jou's dad's name is in the Japanese version but I'm pretty sure it's Jonathan in the US version so I'm going with that for now, k? If any one knows what Jou's fathers name is tell me in a review.Make note of the fact that is being a bitch and does not support my page breaks, sorry if that makes things confusing.

-------------

Making Room For New Pairings

Sunday morning

Kaiba slowly woke up taking in his surroundings. 'That's right,' he remembered, 'I'm at Jou's place.'

He was lying on the carpet with his head on the pillow Jou had brought down to the ground with them, spooning up to Katsuya from behind who was still asleep. Their legs were pleasantly tangled and the comforter covering them was warm. Kaiba wished that he could wake up every Sunday like this.

His hands roamed where they would on the blonde's body, only stopping when they came to his hips. 'What's this?' "Looks like my puppy is having a _very_ nice dream right now." Kaiba's palm rubbed up against Jou's half hard arousal through the pajama pants he had on. Jou moaned out wantonly after a particularly drawn out stroke. 'And all while he's asleep…' Kaiba almost laughed at his thought. Jou bit down on his lip before he found his release, the pressure of Seto's hand bringing him around from his sleep.

Jou rolled over and blinked at him, "Did you just get me off while I was asleep?"

Kaiba smirks, "Why yes, yes I think I did. I just palmed you off in your sleep like the horny little teenager you are."

"Impudence!" Jou squawked before throwing the pillow they had been using at him.

Kaiba was about to lean in and kiss Jou but they heard the door open suddenly.

"Katsuya! I'm home where are you kid?" Answered as to who came in.

They heard as a pair of keys were thrown onto the counter and the footsteps of house slippers on the hardwood of the front hall. Jou was on his back looking up at Seto impatiently as Kaiba leaned over him, one hand on Jou's chest to keep him up right.

"There you are- I didn't know you had company," Jou's father says as he walks into the kitchen that adjoins the living room.

Jou gives Kaiba a kick in the knee making the brunet collapse on the carpet next to him. "Hey dad, how was work?" Jou grins and looks at his dad.

Jonathan loosens his tie and looks at the two boys on the floor, the one beside his son is still face down on the floor. "Who's your friend?"

Jou silently thanks all gods that his pants and boxers cover up that mornings 'mess', "Um."

"His name is Um?"

"No! Dad meet Kaiba Seto. Seto meet my dad."

Kaiba raises his hand in acknowledgement from the ground and offers a weak "Hello sir," from the carpet.

"Can I talk to you in the next room Katsuya?"

At this, Kaiba raises his head and gives Jou a look as if he was off to the executioner's chair.

----------------

In Jon's room

"Katsuya, who is that boy?!" his father demanded.

"I just told you! His name is Kaiba Seto, or is that too much to process at once?"

That earned him a sound thump on the head, "Our design team makes commercials for Kaiba Seto, and you are telling me that he was groping MY son in MY apartment!"

"Whoa, hold it there, how come Kaiba's groping me all of the sudden?" Jou was mentally kicking himself for protesting with such a weak lie.

Jon ran a hand through his graying red hair. "I'm no fool, what were you two doing in there?"

"We were just fighting."

Jon pulled his wallet out of his back pocket and took out his driver's license. "Look carefully at my license, it says that I wasn't born yesterday."

Jou rolled his eyes, "I smacked Kaiba in the face with a pillow and he retaliated, would you rather my friend be a sissy and not stick up for himself?"

"No, I guess your right." He ran his hand through his hair again, a bad habit that Jou had picked up on, "I apologize for jumping to conclusions son, tell Seto that too, I'm sure he heard us in here."

Jou left his father's room and breathed a sigh of relief. Kaiba was sitting up on the floor with his eyes following every step he took. He gave his boyfriend a thumbs up signs. Jou plopped down next to him, "My dad bought my story and he wants me to apologize to you for calling you queer."

"Maybe I should be saying sorry to him… he was pretty much on the money."

"Like hell, he'll probably replace your next commercial with footage showing you being gay to spite you if he knew."

Kaiba had a befuddled look across his face. "Commercial puppy?"

"Yeah, my dad is on the advertisement board and makes television commercials for lots of companies here in Domino, yours especially."

"I knew I had seen the name Jounouchi somewhere else before…" He scowled slightly.

"I didn't know your brain doesn't function properly on weekends," Jou muttered.

"You say something?" Insert murderous death glare. "I personally would like to be out of your apartment before your father has time to play 20 Questions with me."

"Good point, so what do you want to do?" Jou asked.

"Well we should probably go and pick up Mokuba from his friends house, then, maybe we'll go to my house and I'll cook breakfast."

This produces a happy twitch from Jou, "Food?"

Kaiba mentally smacked himself for offering his pet food. "Yes I'll feed you. Not only that I will make fresh cooked food, not any frozen crap that Mokuba eats."

If Jou had a tail it would be wagging. "Okay time to go, times a wasting!" Jou was walking across the room towards the hall when Seto stopped him.

"Katsuya?"

"Hnn?"

"You're still in your night clothes," Kaiba stated, pointing to his apparel.

"Oh, then you change out here and I'll go get dressed in my room."

Kaiba was still looking at him, "Remember to clean up what happened this morning."

He loved how Jou looked when he blushed like that. "Will do."

His puppy spared a glance at Seto and giggled, "You are _very _lucky I don't have a camera."

"And why is that?"

"Your hair… it's… everywhere!" He laughed himself into his room and shut the door behind him.

He starred cross-eyed at his forehead and decided to look in a mirror. He walked to the bathroom and tried to tame his hair. It was sticking up in unnatural ways, or as others call it, the Great Seto Kaiba has bed head!

Kaiba grabbed his overnight bag from next to the couch and pulled out fresh clothes, black jeans and a green shirt, he wondered what Mokuba thought he was doing here at Jou's apartment.

Jou reemerged from his room clad in blue jeans and a bright red pull over. "Can we go get food now?"

"Yes, but we have to get Mokuba and some annoying little friend and drop them off at the arcade first."

"You don't like his friends?" the blonde asked opening the front door.

"Not exactly, I can see through the façade some of those boys put up in order to worm their way into the Kaiba mansion," he told Jou, "Not to mention how blatantly stupid some of them are!"

Katsuya threw an arm around Kaiba as they left the apartment. "I can't believe you of all people are talking about being around people of intelligence when you are dating me!"

Kaiba gave Jou a tender look and a smile, "I didn't say intelligent, and you have quite a bit of potential bottled up inside of you."

Again Jou flushed and gave Kaiba a kiss on the cheek. "I'm still hungry I'll have you know."

Laughter rang out through the silence of the stair well as they descended from the apartment on the seventh and top floor of his apartment. Oblivious they were to the pair of eyes watching them between the cracks of a door with a lens protruding on their way down.

-------------

"Mokuba would you get in the car with your friend!" Kaiba let his head fall onto the steering wheel. He had told Mokuba he would pick him up because he didn't 'think' picking up included waiting for him and his dolt of a friend to emerge, them throwing all their stuff in the back seat only to realize they forgot something in the house, both requesting a different radio station, and then Mokuba asking if he could pick them up again later.

"But Seto! Please!"

"No, call the limo he's a better driver then me and we can spend time together at the mansion," Kaiba told him at a red light.

'Not the pout, not the pout, not the pout, ARGHH! He's pouting!' He slammed his head into the steering wheel this time.

He turned and looked in the backseat, "Kuba, I'll play any game you want later, sound good?"

A devilish grin spread across his younger brother's face, "Anything?"

"Within reason."

"Define 'within reason'."

"Seto, it's a green light," Jou pointed out.

"Thanks Katsuya." He took his foot off the brake and onto the gas.

"Since when have you been on a first name basis with Jou?" Mokuba asked.

"Since when do you care?" Kaiba shot his brother an icy warning glance in the rear view.

Mokuba poked his head between the driver and passenger's seat. "What were you doing last night big brother?"

Kaiba choked a bit, images of him and his puppy curled on a couch innocently kissing and caressing each other came to mind. "Nothing, I just slept over," was all his little brother would get out of him.

"Uh huh, and where did you guys sleep?" Jou instantly picked up on what was trying to be implied.

"Why does it matter?" Jou countered.

"Just curious…"

"We're here, out Kuba," Kaiba ordered.

Seto wondered why Mokuba wanted to go to an arcade when he could have every video game known to man (and a few know to monkey) if he should so request it.

The raven-haired teen waved to them from the curb. "Bye Seto! Have fun doing… stuff. Not that it matters," he added with a wink.

"Good bye Kuba!" Kaiba replied with a roll of his eyes. He stayed to make sure his brother actually went into the arcade as he was known to try and give the elder Kaiba the slip now and then.

"Kuba?" The still anonymous friend asked with a snicker.

Mokuba punched him in the arm, "Yeah, got a problem with it?"

"No. Question."

"Shoot."

"Is your brother gay?"

"Yes."

"Oh."

Mokuba looked to see if Seto was still by the curb. No, he was gone.

-----------------

"I think that's about the most humiliating thing my brother has done to me with another human being present."

"It's not all that bad," Jou told him, leaning over to kiss his neck. "And there's always one thing that will make you fell better," he gave a particular harsh nip below Kaiba's ear.

"You're mind is always in the gutter, but just to humor you, what is it that makes you always feel better?"

"Food."

Kaiba laughed hard enough to be threatening to his driving, "I understand, I've detained you from sweet, fluffy pastries long enough."

Kaiba parked his Honda in front of the mansion not bothering to put it in the garage around the side. He opened up the front door for Jou and him to come in.

"So where's the kitchen?"

"It's up the hall, second door on the right," Kaiba told him.

Jou ran excitedly into the kitchen and sat down at the table. "Your house has the coolest kitchen Seto!" The flawless white tiles glinted marvelously along with all the stainless steel appliances in the sun coming through the windows

"There isn't any food yet, you'll have to wait for me to make it puppy," Kaiba told him.

Jou folded his arms and put his head on them and groaned, "But I'm hungry now!"

"Then eat some cereal," he pulled open a cabinet and put on an apron.

Jou rolled his head to the side to admire the view. "No 'Kiss the Cook' apron?"

"I think Mokuba got me one to be funny."

Kaiba rummages around in the fridge for a minute and re emerges with eggs, milk, butter, bread, syrup, and orange juice in tow. The milk, butter, and orange juice he puts on the table. "Katsuya, would you care to get me a medium sized white bowl with a handle on it, and a big wooden mixing bowl? They're in the cabinet next to dish washer."

The blonde got up and started looking for the bowls. He had his head in the cabinet when… 'WHAT THE FUCK?!' Jou slams his head against the inside of the cabinet forgetting where his head was. He removes his cranium and gives Kaiba an annoyed look. "What was that for?"

Kaiba is counting out how many eggs he'll need to use, he looks up, "What was what for?"

"You know perfectly well!" Jou had perfected a 'ticked-off' look from long hours spent in the principal's office. "And pinching my butt would count as something not to do when I'm looking for something."

"Okay."

Jou went back to his search for the requested items and upon finding the white bowl he put it on top of the counter and kept searching for the other. Kaiba took the bowl over to the stove and began cracking eggs. He lit the stove up and sprayed the frying pan he put on the burner with no stick oil. "Katsuya have you found the mixing bowl yet?"

"No, your 'cabinet' as you call it could hold the entire British naval fleet."

"Then it shouldn't be that difficult."

"Found it!"

Pinch. Pinch pinch. "Kaiba, you're doing it again."

"Doing what?"

In Jou's mind, Kaiba had figured out some way to sneak up behind him, grab his posterior, and then go back to beating eggs before he noticed. "Never mind."

He sat back down and watched his boyfriend cook. Jou sat entranced as he took in Kaiba's movements as he cooked the French toast. The brunet carefully stacked eight or nine pieces of toast now covered in powdered sugar on a plate and then added the beat eggs to the pan. "You can come and get some food now. Ow…"

Jou appeared next to him and grabbed a piece of bread that had come fresh off of the stove. "Whaddya do?"

"I got a grease burn," Seto told him showing him his wrist.

"Those can hurt," Jou told him examining the hurt. "I'll make it all better Seto." He took the injured wrist and kissed it softly, "Mmm, you taste good." Jou proceeded to kiss all down Seto's wrist and down to his fingers.

Kaiba was staring wide eyed as his boyfriend did provocative things with his tongue and sucked on his fingers. "I thought… you were… hungry," he told Katsuya through his now labored breathing.

Jou abruptly stopped, "I was, but then I discovered how edible you were."

The blonde pounced on Kaiba forcing him against the counter and kissed him deeply. "You taste so good."

Kaiba now had his hands under Katsuya's ass and turned around so Jou was on the counter. He decided that his puppy's sweatshirt was in the way and removed it leaving Jou with his white t-shirt on. Kaiba was pulled closer to Katsuya by the belt loops of his jeans; it was obvious to Jou how much Seto wanted him at that moment. He slipped from on top of the counter to his knees and started to make short work of the zipper in front of him. Jou found what he had been searching for covered by navy blue boxers. These and the jeans were pulled down to the floor, Kaiba let out a moan as his erection was released. "What are you doing?" He said looking down in only enough time to see that blonde mop of hair descending toward his stiff arousal. Ooo, was all that could pass through his mind. And the nice wet heat around his cock. His hands gripped the counter fiercely for fear he would fall. "You've done this before," Kaiba noticed.

A slight nod of the head from Jou. Kaiba's hand was in his hair as soon as Jou deep throated him. Seto seemed unable to form coherent sentences and just withered under his touches. He also couldn't seem to control his hips and Jou had him pinned against the counter. Jou enjoyed the feelings of dominance doing this gave him. Kaiba suddenly stiffened and let out a raged moan before releasing into Jou's mouth.

Katsuya stood up and wiped away a bit of come that had ran down the side of his mouth, he looked over Kaiba who was now sweating and looked weak in the knees. "You're a great cook."

Kaiba pulled up his pants and leaned against the counter, "I'm glad you approve of my culinary skills," he looked disdainfully at the food, "It's cold."

Jou gave a short laugh, "Like that has ever stopped me before." He gave the food a look and frowned, "But now I'm not hungry."

"You can eat it later puppy, I'll put it in the fridge," Kaiba kissed him on the cheek.

"Maybe I should just eat you again? Hmm?" Katsuya wiggled his eyebrow suggestively. "Can I use your phone?" An abrupt change of subject in Kaiba's opinion.

"As long as you don't make an international call."

"Got it!" He says with thumbs up sign and hops over to the phone in the kitchen, which happens to be nest to the fridge.

Kaiba has gotten used to listening to half of phone conversations when around Katsuya, and the somewhat rude way he talked to people. Surprisingly though, he was very polite.

"I'd like to schedule an appointment for a new patient. Name Kaiba Seto, age 16."

Jou listens patiently.

"Yes I can have his record transferred from his previous doctor."

Katsuya taps his foot on the tile.

"When? When ever is convenient. Can I request he see Dr. Komiyama? He can? Great, Wednesday at 1:00, alright then."

Jou puts the phone back in the cradle and looks to Seto, "Your appointment is at one o'clock on Wednesday!"

"Pardon me for sounding stupid puppy but appointment for what?"

"For your contacts!"

"Why did you make the appointment during school?" Seto asks him.

"So you don't have to miss anything at work," Jou tells him.

"Oh, well thank you."

"And I get to come with," he says grinning like a maniac, a maniac happy to be missing school that is.

"What?! Why?" Kaiba had suspected ulterior motive.

"Because I have to help you with the things to fill out, and you always want someone with you to put contacts in for the first time 'cause they sting like a bitch, and you don't know where it is so I should drive."

Jou said this all very quickly making it very difficult to here just exactly what he said. "Okay I guess."

"Sh-weet! I get to drive!" He proclaimed his victory by running around the kitchen several times and hooting.

"Wait, what else did you say? Katsuya get your ass back here this minute or I'll flay you alive!" Kaiba then started running in pursuit of the deranged teen.

Their chase continued into the hallway and resulted in the breaking of a vase and an expensive picture falling off the wall. Katsuya made to run up the stairs but was hit in the back by Kaiba who had made a diving lunge at him. This sent the both of them into a sprawl and slid across the tile a good fifteen feet or so.

Kaiba took the opportunity and put Katsuya (he's on his stomach) in a half nelson. "Now what else did I agree to in that monologue of yours?"

The front double doors that are approximately eight feet in front of them opens.

"Fighting so soon? I would have given you guys at least a month before the first fight."

"Mokuba. You're lucky that," struggles to keep Jou on the floor, "I don't believe in grounding you. Or that I don't hurt small children." His eyes flash at his friend.

Kaiba momentarily forgets his grip on Jou for a moment and gets slapped in the face. Quite literally. Jou's running up the hall way _again._

"Sank you very, very much!" He yells over his shoulder encouraging Kaiba to chase him.

"Mutt I'm going to have you fixed when I catch you." And with that the pursuit continues.

As for Mokuba and nameless friend…

"Is he always like that?"

"Yup," Mokuba hands his friend a twenty.

"What's this for?"

"Hush money."

-------------

Blue: Hi ho!

Carrie: Hi ho!

Honda: It's off to kill Anzu we go!

Otogi: With crossbow in tow!

Shizuka: We go! We go!

Blue: Hi ho!

Carrie: Hi ho!

Everyone: Hi ho! Hi ho!

Random person: _walks up to Anzu in greetings _Hi ho!

Blue: Now that my Anzu bashing for the… moment… has been satisfied, I loved writing this and I want you all to know that!

Carrie: _gets mace_ Down girl, Honda get the tranquilizer!

Otogi: We'll see you later now that both of the authors are, err… detained! Have a nice night everyone, and remember to play Dungeon Dice Monsters!

Shizuka: Now who needs a tranquilizer…

Blue: _escapes for a moment_ Does any one want me to change the title of this story? I don't remember why I called it this, and if anyone has any ideas put them in a review and I'll consider them. And give the winner a big ol' virtual cookie!

Carrie: You are coming with me…_ drags Blue into a mental institution  
_


	9. Fighting for No Reason

Blue: Hi y'all, I escaped from the men in white jackets! And Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukah, and Krazy Kwanzaa!

Carrie: I will kill you…

Anzu: Be happy, it's Christmas!

Carrie: No it's not! That was months ago! You know when this was supposed to be updated, but then nooo… Blue has to go and break two of her fingers in a door. Where the hell is my crossbow!

Honda: Here Carrie, do the disclaimer.

Carrie: _is suddenly on a sugar high _I do not own it in Japan, I do not own it 'merican…

Blue: Thanks genius! Look what you've got her doing now! It's freakin' Dr. Suess!

Honda: Uh…

Carrie: I do not own them in a box, I do not own the cute boys c…

Otogi: _gags her with stereo cord _Help please!

Shizuka: We are currently experiencing technical difficulties, please stand by. –beep-

Carrie: I do not own them in a car, I do not own them near or far…

...Carrie: Ya know this is really pissing me off that is not supporting my line breaks, it makes me think I'm all organized and then this happens! Apologies from myself and Blue if you get cinfused from teh lack of line breaks at any point.

Blue: Oh yay! I actually have to do this myself for once!

Amanda-chan: Sure of course you can come on the hunting trip!

Kumori Sakusha formerly Saelbu: Thank you for your diligent reviewing, people like you make my day.

Kenshinfan21: Erm… we've been backlogged, so we'll blame the slow updates on that.

Miru Amai: Well, when you have loads of money it's easier to do.

Celestial Psyche: Thanks! I think I will leave the title as it is. The only muse I can see me killing in the near future is Anzu and, _looks around,_ okay maybe I'll just kill them all when I get bored.

Crazyrabidfangurl01: Right, I'll call the story 'Um, I have No Clue' that'll be great! _Prods Crazy with a stick, _Silence! Or it will be merely limeade!

Yukiko-Angel: Who me? Thanks, I know he is.

Mandapandabug: Thanks for all the great ideas, but I'm gonna keep the title the same.

Hirarinotenshi15 and Tapeka: I'm keepin' the writing flame burning bright to turn out these chapters to you!

Kira Chara: Ya know what? I'll let you rip off the head.

Current Music: Green Day

Making Room For New Pairings

Wednesday morning, 6:17 A.M.

…he moved his hands sensually up his sides. Their sweaty bodies moving against each other in a hard, fast rhythm. And his hard… floor.

"Well damn that sure is a nice way to wake up," Katsuya mumbled to himself as he started to remove the sheets from his bed.

"What was that?" his dad yelled from the other side of his door. "I come home and you're making all this noise."

His father opens the door and sees Katsuya standing there with soiled bed sheets and a big wet spot in the front of his boxers. Jonathan threw his head back and laughed, "What are you twelve?"

"Thank you and goodbye!" He throws the door shut and can still hear his father laughing through the wall.

Kaiba Mansion, 7:33 A.M.

"Seto wake up!"

Kaiba rolled over onto his side and put his head under the pillow. "Go away."

He waited for Mokuba's useless pleas for him to get up. Seto Kaiba hardly ever slept in, but when he did nothing was to disturb him at all. The nagging to getup never came. His bed bounced underneath him, "Mokuba get out of my bed right now or I'll tell you about everything that's been done in this bed."

"Ooo, sexy. But not the best of timing, we gotta go to school."

Kaiba rolled back over to see Jounouchi lying in bed with his school uniform on.

"Somehow I thought your room would be all blue," Katsuya remarked staring absently at the ceiling.

Seto nearly jumped out of his skin when he saw him lying there. "How the fuck did you get passed my security…" he started.

Jou was making imaginary patterns on the canopy with his finger.

He snapped his fingers in front of his face, "You all there?"

Jou looked at him, "Yeah, I was just thinking about why you chose to blanket your room in green."

"That is unimportant, what is is that you decided to jump in my bed when I haven't slept and now you expect to leave being able to walk upright."

Katsuya fell out of bed, "Down boy!" Kaiba said as he fell. A slight growl issued from the floor.

Kaiba leaned over and spoke to Katsuya, "You stay there Chihuahua and I'll get dressed." Rather than argue, Jou sat and looked at all the stuff around his boyfriend's room. 'Well, it's all green in here… There's a painting of a forest and some silver trinkets and a mirror… Short attention span can't concentrate… Must resist temptation to do something stupid…' He resumed making patterns with his fingers before Kaiba reemerged from the attached bathroom. Seto's pants had his belt near his hips instead of farther up in the loops making him look even thinner than he was. The black tank top he was modeling didn't look half bad either. Unfortunately his school jacket was put on too.

"We should get going."

"Okay! Where are the keys to the car?" Jou happily asked.

Seto rolled his eyes, "Which one? And I only said you get to drive to the optometrist's office."

"Um, damn. I forgot you have so many cars… Got a Corvette?" he asked.

"Yes, a white one. Will that do Your Royal Highness?" Seto said with sarcasm.

Jou struck a pose, "Now I wish to be carried in a litter. I want man servants to carry me, sexy man servants!" Kaiba whacked him in the back of the head with his briefcase.

"Garage. Car. Now." Jou skittered out of the room followed by Kaiba into the front hall to wait for Mokuba. Then the raven-haired teen came sliding down the banister on cue and the three of them walked around the side of the mansion to the garage. Jou 'oooo'ed at the Corvette sitting there.

"Shotgun, no shambles!" Katsuya yelled.

Mokuba looked at the car, "Big brother, this car only has two seats."

Jou and the elder Kaiba had evil looks on their faces.

Mokuba backed away slowly, "What are you two doing?"

Katsuya stood on tiptoes and whispered in Seto's ear. "My puppy just had a brilliant idea."

"And that was…?"

"Call your seat boy: Mir, Cover-up, or Ex-Wife," Jou barked out like a drill a sergeant.

"But I don't know what they- "

"CHOOSE!"

"Ex-wife!"

Jou high fived Kaiba, "Seto, pop the trunk."

"WHAT!" Mokuba yelled.

Jounouchi picked up Mokuba and set him down in the trunk, handed him his school bag, and slammed the trunk down. "What da 'ell is Mir and cover up!" came a muffled shout from the trunk.

Jou sat down in the passenger seat and Kaiba took the driver's. Katsuya banged on the top of the trunk for silence. "Cover-up is the 'seat' where you're stuffed in where a convertible top comes out of, and Mir is getting duct taped to the roof. These seats only available in two seaters."

"I'm 'appy in da trunk!"

In Domino High parking lot

"So we're gonna act how we normally would in class, right?"

"That would be right," came Seto's answer.

"And what am I supposed to say if someone asks why I left school with you?" Katsuya asked.

They got out and started walking into the school. "Hmm, say I'm taking you to court for vandalism or larceny."

"Larceny! What of yours would I steal!" Jou thought it was insulting to even think he was a thief.

Seto stepped in front of him and pulled him close, "You managed to steal my heart piece by piece." He planted a kiss on Katsuya's cheek.

The blonde flushed, "You're embarrassing me."

"You'll get over it."

The two walked to class and went in to find that none of their peers were here yet. They dumped their things on their desks and sat down. "Well we're twenty minutes early. Can you thing of anything to occupy our time?" Seto asked with a faux innocent smile.

"You dirty little…" Jou turned around and hit him in the arm.

"I was thinking of checkers or something," Kaiba cut him off and widening his smile.

Katsuya stuck his tongue out and sat on Kaiba's desk. "You need to stop saying things that have sexual undertones."

"And you need to get your mind out of the gutter," he countered and pinched Jou's butt.

Katsuya made a squeaking noise and jumped a bit. "I know it was you that did that!"

"What are you talking about puppy?"

"When you were cooking and I was looking for the bowls and I slammed my head when someone decided to grab my butt!"

"You're so melodramatic sometimes," Seto said leaning back and relaxing.

Katsuya sat in his seat and started staring at Kaiba. He met his gaze and held it neither willing to break the growing silence around them. Bakura and Ryou came into the classroom laughing. Their laughter stopped as they saw them locked in a staring contest. "Hey guys, w-what's going on?" Ryou asked nervously. The two of them together were like a ticking time bomb.

Jou and Kaiba continued without speaking. More students started to come in and the competition was drawing a small crowd. It only ended after… "Hey Yuugi! I'm going to play tennis after school! My outfit is sooo cute!" Anzu announced. The two duelists clapped their hands over their eyes at the mental images, the duel, was a draw.

"You're lucky Anzu messed us up Kaiba, or else I woulda won."

"What was that mutt?" Kaiba gave Jou a strange look and received a wink back.

'Ah, he's teasing,' Katsuya realized. "I was just telling you how I would've flogged you if there hadn't been a distraction," he said with a note of arrogance.

Trade mark Kaiba smirk in place, "Fine, why don't we step outside and finish this in the parking lot?" 'Ha! Wasn't expecting that!' Kaiba thought to himself.

"Uh, um, about that…" 'What the hell is he thinking?'

"Look the dog's running away with his tail between his legs!" The Kaiba Fan Club was nodding along with everything he said.

Jou walked up to him so they were face to face, or face to chest… "You think you're so great then why don't you take a break!" Jou faked a right and hit him in the side with a left hook. Seto grabbed a blonde lock to pull Jou closer and got his arm around his neck. Katsuya stepped on Kaiba instep rather brutally and knocked him to the ground with an elbow to the side. Jou sat on Seto's thighs and clawed at him scratching him around the neck and chin. Seto head-butted him in the face so he had to clutch at his nose in agony. The teacher entered the room and saw the circle around the fighting boys. He pushed his way to the center and pried them apart. "Look at you! The first bell hasn't even rung and you're already in trouble and I need to send both of you to the principal's office!"

They sat on the floor for a moment as the other teens mingling around dispersed. The sensei walked back over with two pieces of paper handed one to each and watched as they read them. The teacher smacked them in the head; "Don't read it here! You'll have plenty of time to do that when you wait for the principal now get out of here!" He threw Katsuya and Seto out of the room and told them not to come to his class today.

It was too hot in the main office, or so was Katsuya's opinion. Maybe it was because he had just been fighting. Kaiba had a long scratch across his throat and Jou had ripped his jacket in several places around the collar. And he himself was having blood come out his nose from some good blows to his face. The secretary didn't even acknowledge their presence as they were over due for their weekly ritual of being sent to the office together. "What was it this time?" Junika the secretary asked absently.

"Fighting," Jou replied. "I could take him though, just look at these muscles," he pulled up his shirt to show off a six pack for her.

"Ooo, strong man."

Katsuya got hit in the head with… a shoe? What the fuck?

"Knock it off of you'll have indecent exposure on your record on top of brawling."

"You're just jealous I have a six pack and you're left high and dry with nothing but a flat stomach," Jounouchi said shrugging his shoulders.

Kaiba leaned over and grabbed him by the collar, "I could knock that grin off your face so fast that you wouldn't even know what…"

Junika had rushed from behind her desk with her rolled up newspaper and smacked them both in the head. "Don't make me put you two in opposite corners!"

They turned away from each other, both had theirs arms crossed.

"I hate you," Kaiba said.

"I hate you more."

"I hate you most."

"I know you care!" Jou turned around and flung his arms around Kaiba's neck.

Seto rolled his eyes and patted Katsuya's forearm that was in the process of half strangling him and lifted the blonde onto his knee.

The secretary watched them and Satan himself could have come up from the ground to offer her an executive position in Hell and she wouldn't have been as shocked as she was at that moment. "Have you guys been putting up a front to fool people since junior high?" Junika had worked in the Domino school district for seven years and had heard about them since they were in junior high. The fights these two had started have been legendary in physical brutality and numbers, not to mention the verbal debates the blonde and brunet had also engaged in were beyond count.

Seto turned to look at the woman and ran a hand through his hair. "No, we haven't been fooling everyone in the district the entire span of our academic careers. But recently I've become slightly fonder of him than is considered healthy." He paused briefly to let his head fall on top of Jounouchi's, "I found something in my life that's constant; because I can always come to school and know exactly what to expect from him. He's someone to always challenge me and make me seem like I'm more like a normal teen."

Junika was positively ecstatic over this new revelation, "Would you two kiss? I want to see if it's as hot as I always thought seeing you two kiss would be."

Kaiba shrugged, Jou shrugged, "What the hell."

Junika stood there and blushed as she saw them languidly kissing in one of the waiting chairs. And it was then that Mr. Nakagawa, the principal, decided to walk in to summon his next victim(s) into his office. What he saw was 1) his secretary watching two teenage boys kissing in the office and nearly having an orgasm doing so, 2) two teenage boys kissing in the office, 3) KAIBA and JOUNOUCHI kissing in the office.

"What is the name of all things holy is going on here!" he yelled.

Junika looked to the boys for help and found none and turned to look back at her superior, "Uh, great news sir! Those two have learned to… get… along," her voice getting weaker under his intense gaze.

He cocked an eyebrow at Kaiba and Jou, the two gazing at each other with intense lust in their eyes. "Maybe if I call both of your parents it will stop this disgusting display of public affection."

"NO!" they yelled in unison, Jou fell off Kaiba's leg and sat in the chair next to him.

"Oh, and why not? It's what I do to all students sent here for expressing their love for each other in the school."

Kaiba's cheeks flamed red while Katsuya looked like a deer in the headlights. Jou relaxed slowly, "What's it gunna take to keep this incident on the low note and have you not call my dad?"

"I could have you landscape the whole grounds, or perhaps you should mop the top two floors, maybe reorganize the entire library," he saw the boys wince at each threat he made. "Or maybe you can promise me not to do it again and I'll let it slide, both of you are first time offenders on this count." Jou looked eternally grateful while Kaiba felt a huge weight lifted off his shoulders. "Now get out of here, I noticed Mr. Kaiba's name on the advance notice sign out sheet, so go now."

They both scuttled to their feet, bowed, and ran out of the office.

Junika looked at Mr. Nakagawa. "What?" he asked her.

"You know perfectly well, pay up!"

He sighed, got out his wallet, and counted out a hundred dollars. "Fine you win, I always thought they were such opposites," he muttered walking back to his office.

"Remember, opposites attract!" she yelled after him.

In the car, driving

"That was too close for comfort," Katsuya says.

"_You_ were too close for comfort back there. I swear you're like an automatic override to anything else going on in my brain. I could be sitting in my boardroom, having a meeting, and you could stroll in, sit on my lap and I'd have to tell my associates to remove themselves so I could bend you over the desk and have my way with you."

Jou, who was driving, suddenly slowed, pulled off to the side of the road and put into park.

"What are you do- ?" Kaiba was cut off, Jou's warm tongue invading his mouth. He was leaning over the clutch and pushing Kaiba into the side door. "I'm better now thank you." The car was put back into drive and they were back on the road.

"What brought that on?"

"You talking about things you would do to me while at your office," a huge smile was plastered across his face.

Kaiba sat silent for a moment. "I can arrange something if it pleases you that much."

Katsuya briefly took his eyes off the road to look at his boyfriend; "Well the man has a bold side! Just imagine me screaming your name and having a co-worker walk in at that moment, hearing that and seeing their reaction."

"Which co-worker?" he asked smirking.

"Any."

"I would want it to be my secretary, I need an excuse to fire her," he told Jou.

"Why would you want to fire her? Does she not do her job?"

'Oh sure, she does her job. It's what she did that _wasn't _in the job description that made him want to fire her.' "She's a bit ditzy and doesn't realize it, she treats a delivery boy the same as she does another CEO of a company that's discussing trade rights with me." Seto pretended to look uninterested and let his face fall into his hand, "Yes, Mr. Kaiba will see you in a moment, he's with a more important client right now though so you'll have to wait out here." He looked at Jou again, "And she winks at me all the time when she thinks no one is looking."

Jounouchi twitched, "So we're going to have a witch burning this weekend, ne?"

"Whatever you want puppy, but you'll have to tie her to the stake. I'm just tossing on the gasoline."

Katsuya snickers, "You're sadistic."

"And you are stupid," says Kaiba.

Jou points to the windshield, "Look! You're face hitting the windshield!" Jou slammed on the brake going from 45 to 0 in half a second. Kaiba flew out of the seat and hit windshield like Jou had said.

The brunet got back into his seat and glared, "Bastard."

"That'll teach you to wear your seatbelt while in a moving vehicle."

Twitch, twitch.

"We're here!" Jou announced happily as he pulled into a parking lot.

The optometrist's office was on the far side of Domino's business district in a small strip mall. The bold letters above the front door announced to the world that the office was called 'Eyes on You'. Jou led Kaiba in by the arm and sat him down in a waiting chair and started to walk around and look at glasses frames on display.

A young woman of about twenty eight with short black hair walked into the waiting area. She smiled warmly at them, "Hello Katsuya, what are you doing here, you just saw me less than six months ago."

Jou laughed, "No, no, I'm fine Dr. Komiyama. I'm here with my friend here; he's your one o'clock appointment." He pointed to Kaiba who was scowling in the chair.

She walked over to a small desk next to the door she came out of and picked up a clipboard. "Yes, indeed you are Mr. Kaiba. Here for contacts are you, well this should be a fun afternoon. But you're awfully early though, I hope you guys can amuse yourselves in the mean time."

Kaiba looked at the clock; it read 9:30 in shiny digital numbers. 'Shit this is going to be a lo-ong day.'

Carrie: smacks Blue That only took forever!

Otogi: smacks Blue Yeah!

Honda: I feel left out… smacks Blue I feel better now!

Shizuka: At least you two are in this story.

Blue: Blah blah blah blah! I'm the one getting hit!

ding dong

Carrie: opens door My muses! You came to visit! Normally you just stay in my head.

Jou: We got bored. hugs Seto

Kaiba: He's clinging again. twitch twitch

Jou: nuzzles

SLAM! FWUUM! BAM! CRASH! BANG BANG BANG!

Carrie: commentating on the side Oh that was beautiful! Bashed his head into a desk, followed by throwing him through the screen door to hit the van, hit him over the head with the printer finished by three shots of a .27! Wow, I couldn't have exhibited a better example of video game violence if I tried!

Blue: -.-;; We love you, good night.


	10. Those Don't Go in the Microwave!

Blue: 'Allo, 'allo! This story is brought to you by Minute Man Slushies! "The gift that makes the world go round."

Carrie: **snort** Like hell you could get a sponsor even if you tried.

Blue: Stupid person ruining my fun… But guess what!

Honda: What?

Carrie: **dances around** IgotTekken5IgotTekken5IgotTekkken5Igot…

Otogi: **twitch twitch** BAM!

Carrie: Oww…

Blue: No-o, my brother gave me sugar!

Shizuka: Oh god, you can come in now!

Men in white suits: **drag Blue away while she's cackling**

Blue: You'll never take me alive! Ha ha ha ha ha!

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Reviews:

Crazyrabidfangurl: **Blue barely restrains Carrie** Shouldn't do that hon, Carrie's gonna jump you in a dark alley and she'll have reason if yoou've hit her with a paper fan.

Kumori Sakusha formerly Saelbu: Aww, love from constant reviewers!

Velvetina: Don't worry, if anyone understands about computers crapping out on them Carrie does. Carrie: But really you flatter us.

Lothwen the Harpist: We're glad you picked the fic up and started reading it again. And yes, this chapter is going to be really yummy. ; ) (We're hyper too!)

Miru Amai: Carrie: Yeah Blue did that to her driving instructor the first time she took her test for her drivers license 'cause the guy was being an ass at the DMV… But anyway, lots of our humor is twisted in the way of people holding betting pools about people private lives, kinda like how my guy friends always invite me to play cards with them or else they'd be playing strip poker with only men! XD

Mandapandabug: Bue: We decided to make Seto the biggest cheese ball on the face of the planet, and frankly we aren't too disappointed with the results… Don't worry about leaving long reviews, we **Carrie smushes her face in to see** love reading what people have on their minds!

FireieGurl, Sami Ryou's Hikari: O.O We're flattered. Really.

Yuki-nakayama-hidaka: **Double bounce** We love Jou and Seto too!

ChainsLeatherSex: That was a new kind of review, judge cards… Thanks, we like to know how fan satisfaction is doing, keep us posted!

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Current music_: March to the Scaffold _from _Symphonie fantastique _by Hector Berlioz

Disclaimer: Recycling bin sliding, while dangerous and not encouraged, is a hell of a lot of fun, ask Carrie.

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Making Room for New Pairings, Ch. 10: Those Don't go in the Microwave!

Optometrist's office, 10:04 AM

Current Inventory:

Paper, lots of paper

A clip board

Rubber bands

Paper cup, paper plates

Pens w/ caps and pencils

1 flame retardant blanket

Easter peeps (aged to perfection)

1 microwave

Sharpie markers

Scissors

1 recycling bin

Spray air freshener

Jou was stating what was currently in the office that they could safely use without being murdered by Dr. Komiyama.

"All right I get it! There isn't much to do here and I know you're bored but you can't just destroy this poor woman's office," Seto told him exasperated.

Jou looked at him with an air of innocence about him. "I'm not planning on it."

"Then what are you going to… OW! What in the name of all nine circles of hell was that!"

#1 Kaiba Rule: Fear projectiles.

Jou sat in his chair at a safe distance of three feet with an arsenal of paper clip lined up along the arm and was carefully firing them at Seto using a rubber band.

"What are you OW! Doing? OW! Are you OW! Three or something OW!"

"Damn, no more paper clips," Jou mumbled to himself disregarding what his boyfriend was saying. "Hey, there's a good ramp outside I'm going sliding."

10:11AM

New #1 Kaiba Rule: Never leave Katsuya to his own devices.

Jou ran outside with the recycling bin in hand. Kaiba followed with his finger on the speed dial for the local hospital. Outside, Katsuya put down the bright yellow bin at the top of a smooth, thirty feet long, concrete ramp and got in. And it was wet. "Give me a push Kaiba!" He exclaimed doing his best to sound like a small child.

Seto stood there and pinched the bridge of his nose thinking it over. 'If he wants a push, I guess I'll push him.' Kaiba walked behind Jou, put his hands on his back, and gave a firm shove.

"Wooo hooo!" Katsuya yelled as he gripped the front of the recycling bin and he spun out at the end of the ramp. "Let's go again!"

Kaiba shook his head; 'I've started a monster.' He saw Jou grinning like a boy given candy for no reason and thought otherwise.

"Now it's your turn!"

Eyes widen, heart racing, sweat breaks on forehead. "I think I'll pass on this one…" Seto looking longingly at the chair in the office he had vacated.

"Nuh uh, you gotta try it at least once before you say no," Jou proclaimed.

"I've done it and before and don't like it."

Major eye roll. "I'm glad you decided to be a CEO and not a lawyer because you're a terrible liar."

Seto had the good grace to be mildly irritated at that comment, "How about you get an IOU and we'll settle it later."

Katsuya's eyes narrowed in a devious way, "Can you owe me _anything_?" His voice lingered on the last word a little longer.

"Yes, I promise."

"Okay, we can go back inside then!" Seto found his hand grabbed and he was dragged inside again.

10:57 AM

It was quiet, too quiet… Jou had been quiet for almost a half since they inside from Jou's 'wild ride', something just wasn't right.

Seto turned his head to look back at Jou, wait! Where did he go? Hummm… he snapped his attention towards the microwave. "Jou what are you cooking in there?" Be afraid, very afraid.

"Peeps."

"Jou! You don't put those is the microwave!" He ran towards the table with the microwave on it, only to see a little yellow chick go POOF! all over the inside. The little table inside stopped spinning and Seto popped open the small door. The entire surface area of the microwave had yellow sugar and fluff on it.

Jou ran his fingers through the explosion and sucked on it greedily. Kaiba eyes him. "What? This is the only way to eat a peep."

Snort. "And I eat ice cream through a straw."

"Wow, that must give you a headache. But speaking of ice cream we should get some on the way home to celebrate your being able to see the world again," Jou ran his hand in for another taste of blown up peeps.

11:13AM

"Jou. Katsuya… you awake?" Kaiba had the mop of golden hair on his shoulder, and his lap filled with Katsuya, who was snoring softly. "Sigh… I can't help but love you, puppy…" He drifted of to sleep with his mind filled with blond hair and chocolate covered eyes.

12:29PM

Seto slowly blinked awake, immediately noticing he was cold, that cold was due to an absence of Katsuya. "Jou? Where did you run off to, don't make me call the dogcatcher." A folded piece of paper came flying by him. Kaiba looked around the room and saw the source of the flying menaces was coming from behind the desk. Cautiously, he leaned over to inspect. Whoosh… Seto saw Jou leaning against the desk on the floor with a small armada of paper airplanes that he had made and modified during the time of his brief nap.

"Seto, can you hand me 'The Avenger'? It landed near your feet," Jou asked while folding a new piece of paper.

" 'The Avenger'?" The brunet was straining to hold back a laugh. He bent down and picked it up and saw sure enough the airplane's name printed on the side in green marker. Seto handed it to Katsuya.

Jou accepted it. "Yes, do you have a problem with my brain child's name?"

"Not at all…" Kaiba mumbled looking at the fleet surrounding his boyfriend. The planes sported names like: My Susannah, Thunderclap, The Crimson King, _Only Strikes at Mid-World Lanes_, Your Mom Goes to College, The F-ing Cancer Sticks, etc. "Have you ever considered joining our school's creative writing program, Jou?"

"Nope." 'Charyou Tree' made its maiden flight before spinning backward on itself and crashing. "I should clean these up before the doc comes back or else," he said as he scooped the planes into the waste bin. Kaiba went and sat back down in his chair, and Jou sat in 'his' chair. 'His' chair being Kaiba.

A mother and her son walked into the office and gave them a funny look but chose not to comment.

1:04PM

The mother and son came out of the examination room looking pleased and smiled at the boys as she walked out. Dr. Komiyama came out of the small room and told Kaiba and Jou they could come in.

"Katsuya, just to demonstrate, do you want to read the lowest line you can on the chart?" She asked him.

"Sure," he went and stood on the line drawn in the carpet. "Ninth line, M-Y V-I-S-I-O-N I-S F-I-N-E."

The doctor smacked him in the head; "Go sit down wise guy. Now Seto, come here and put on your glasses and read the lowest you can."

Kaiba pulled his sleek, half moon, silver-framed glasses out and put them on. "Seventh line down, a, n, p, r, 5, j, s, o, e, d, 9, k."

"Very good, except the third letter is a 'G' not a 'P'." They repeated this process with him covering his right eye then his left. "Go sit in the chair by the wall and we can start evaluating you for your new prescription."

"Tell me better or worse after each new lens."

"Better, better, worse, better," he told her with all the excitement of a cow chewing cud.

She had him compare the prescriptions a moment later by saying one or two. "You have a new prescription of –1.25 instead of –1.0. Now for the fun part of you getting to stick plastic in your eyes for the first time."

Jou nudged her and spoke in a whisper; "Can ya be a little nicer? He didn't want to come in the first place."

Komiyama patted him on the head, "Don't worry hon, I just have a warped sense of humor when it comes to kids getting contacts."

She sat Kaiba down at a small table and handed him two contact trays. "Just open then up and set them on your finger like a little bowl." Seto did as he was told and held the small disk on the pad of his right index finger. "Good, I'll teach you how to put the contact in although you can do it differently once you're used to them. Pull your top right eyelid open with your left index finger and the bottom with your right middle finger and pop the sucker in!"

In Kaiba's mind the process was relatively simple. But as soon as he realized his eye had an overwhelming urge to shut when a foreign object was brought near it he soon became frustrated. "Jou, it's not going to go in."

The blonde blew a lock out of his face, "Says you, here I'll show you." He grabbed a pair of sample contacts and quickly popped them in and showed Seto. Which consequently made Kaiba blush at the first thought that rose to his mind. '_And you'll_ _see her standing there, with green eyes and long blonde hair. She won't be wearing…_ bad train of thought. Stupid song…'

He loved Jou's brown eyes, but those green contacts made him look so much more like a woman than he cared to admit. "I still can't get them in."

An exasperated sigh from Jou. "Just sit still." Katsuya sat across from him with a contact on the tip of his finger. He leaned forward and licked the patch of skin right below his ear and then blew on it. Kaiba's eyes immediately shot open from the feeling of warm and cold and Jou got one contact in while he was stunned. Seto blinked several times to adjust to having something between his eyelid.

"This by far takes the cake on hilarious experiences while someone is getting their contacts. I've had crying fits, and screaming matches, but I have never seen someone use that method to get contacts in someone's eyes." The doctor was eyeing them, "Now all you have to do is get the other one in and you'll be good."

"Open your eyes wide and focus on me Seto," Jou told him.

Seto fixated himself on Jou's now green eyes, 'So beautiful…' "Ah! Son of a bitch!" Jou popped the contact in when he wasn't expecting it.

"Don't rub at it Seto, it'll just irritate them." Jou slapped Kaiba's hands down to the table.

The doctor coughed to get their attention. "Now all you have to do is remember to take them out each night and put them in saline solution. The office will put in your order for the lenses so you are good to go!"

Jou and Kaiba were getting ready to go when Kaiba remembered something; "Doctor, can I have a pair of those green contacts?"

She gave him a curious look but said sure, "Those aren't prescription just to remind you."

"I know, they're for Katsuya," Seto told her.

"All right, then I'll see you in a year when you need more contacts," she thought for a moment and then said, "Just remember you shouldn't sleep in these, so don't let Katsuya wear you out too much," wink.

Insert baffled look from Kaiba.

"…"

"…"

"…Oh!"

Katsuya saw/heard this exchange and covered his face with his hands. "C'mon we're leaving," and he dragged Seto back to the car.

"Soo… how do you like the contacts?" Jou asked.

Kaiba blinked and looked at him. "Everything is brighter and sharper looking, I enjoy seeing the world clearly."

"That's good. Get in the car, I'm taking you out for ice cream," Jou ordered.

"Demanding aren't we?" Seto said as he got into the passenger side of the car.

"Me? No? Never?" Jou joked as he pulled out of the parking lot.

"Sarcasm? You? Never?"

"Kaiba? Hit window? Again." With that Jou stepped on the brake sending Kaiba into the windshield for the second time that day.

Seto climbed back into the seat; "Well don't you just suck." He glared at Jou, much to his disappointment he didn't succeed in setting Jou on fire with laser vision.

Katsuya rolled his eyes, "But it's not whether I suck or not that matters, it's if I spit or swallow."

Kaiba put his face in his hands. "Never again Jou, never again."

"Let's go get some ice cream."

"Agreed."

………………….

Blue: You had fun with this one didn't you Carrie.

Carrie: Yup.

Blue: We apologize for the lateness of this chapter…

Carrie: it's because of real life scheduling that got in the way.

Otogi: Damn real life!

Carrie: It's because I had soccer (still do), French club, tech crew, band, and a huge manga fix to slate…

Blue: and I had fencing, volunteer work, rugby, and torturing Anzu on the side.

Honda: But the one thing ya gotta remember…

Shizuka: TO FEED THE AUTHOR!

Blue: Next chapter: Dirty innuendo while eating ice cream, an intrigue with green contacts. And someone has a picture of Jou and Seto, who is it and what do they want?

Everyone: Bye!


	11. The Day the World Shit Itself

Blue: We're going to stop promising updates within a week.

Carrie: They just don't happen.

Honda: Even though Carrie was on summer break.

Carrie: I have plenty of other things to do other than bust my ass for you!

Otogi: Name three.

Carrie: You're not nice…

Blue: **looks up from newspaper** That was fascinating…

Carrie: And you can now check out our other story under the Tekken category, "Welcome to Ardith".

Blue: But no one cares.

Carrie: TT You are so cruel Haruko-chan! Opps, wrong manga.

Blue: And now for what we think we would happen if Seto were a redneck!

Kaiba: **sits on couch** I want a beer an' I want ta see somethin' nekid.

Carrie: And there you have it!

Jou: **walks in** What the hell did you do to him! **kills Carrie**

Blue: That's not good… I need her for editing…

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Reviews:

Icy Sapphire15: **huggles Seto **Yah, they are. But who cares? This chapter is getting written and then everyone will be happy when it's done.

Kenshinfan21: Gomen nasai on the slow updates!

Miru Amai: The lyrics are from Blink 182's "The Party Song". I didn't put any more in cause 1) this isn't a song fic (Thank the gods). And 2) the lyrics go on to say that girls like that do nothing but flirt and leave you with a case of blue balls at the end of the night : P.

Darkwitch17: Here, we present the next chapter.

PrettyRaven: Thank you! Blue we have a fan! Blue: **grins** Carrie's on pills too! Carrie: Shut yer pie hole! I'm actually trying to find someway to slam Kaiba into a window again.

Mandapandabug: No long reviews are good! I just threw that in the plot blender for flavor. I also have a plot oven for fresh baked yaoi!

Youko: Thankies!

Shimisaki-kun: We were going for weird and way out of character.

Rose In The Shadows: And we give you a major ten too! **hugs the reviewer**

Ithildae a Celeb Naur: No pokey the beta! Blue does that to me enough! My favorite fruit is Lee Chaolan from Tekken. Blue: And my favorite is umm… mandarins! Carrie: **thwacks Blue** Shaddup!

Iridescent Vie: Cool, glad we got you addicted.

moony-lupin-2: Poor Ryou, I think I already drove him crazy...

linku: Wow, I'm surprised you sat through that, we applaud you and hope you continue reading.b

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Current Music: Fruitcake by: Jimmy Buffet

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We do not own Yu-Gi-Oh, Jimmy Buffet lyric copyrights, Tekken, Blue Collar Comedy, or Legolas' forest green thong. ...Don't ask.

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Making Room for New Pairings, Chapter 11: The Day the World Shit Itself

Kaiba and Jou made it safely to an ice cream parlor a couple streets over without any more incidents involving the brakes and the windshield. Kaiba personally noted that Katsuya was a complete gentleman and treated him sweetly. Opened his door and held out his arm and everything. Jou thought everything was perfect and he was off the hook until Kaiba saw his face in the store window and saw that all the blood was pooling around his nose and making him look flushed. 'Well there goes my once chance of survival…'

"Katsuya! Look what you did to my face!"

He rolled his eyes, "But you look so cute like that." And narrowly missed the fist that swung his way.

They walked into the ice cream shop and all the old couples and mothers with small children looked in their direction to see who had come in. Kaiba shot a deadly glare at Jou; "You are _so_ lucky there are small children here."

"I know you care," Jou leaned over and pecked him on the cheek.

"Go pick out your ice cream Jou, that was the whole reason we came here right?" He pointed at the display case showing all the different flavors.

"Seto!" Jou whined at him, "This was all about celebrating that you got your contacts! You have to get some too!"

"Fine, if it'll make you happy."

"It will, you're too skinny so we're gonna get you a double scoop," he accented his statement with poking him in the ribs.

Kaiba overheard one of the old couples sitting in a booth near them talking, "Look at them they are so cute, I wonder if all the young couples are like them?" The woman asked her husband.

He sighed, 'Thank all things holy I didn't wear my trench coat, no one recognizes me because I don't look very imposing.'

The sales clerk came to the counter and asked what they would have. "I want a double scoop chocolate waffle cone please!" Jou told the man.

"And I'll have a single…"

"Double!" Jou interrupted.

"A double strawberry waffle cone."

"That'll be ¥656," they were told.

Jou started to pull the money out of his pockets when Kaiba stopped him. "I got it, don't worry about it." He produced a ¥1000 bill and received his change. When they got their ice cream they went and sat at a table by the window.

Seto sat there lazily licking at his cold desert. Katsuya watched this display for several moments before realizing he was staring. "Seto will stop molesting that frickin' ice cream cone with your mouth already!"

"Huh?" He stopped eating and looked at Jou who was looking at him as if he was doing something obscene. "What?"

Jou leaned closer and whispered to him, "Would ya cut that out, it looks like you're giving that ice cream head."

Kaiba let his head drop onto the table, "Is that it? That you can't keep your imagination under control?"

"No!" Came the immediate answer.

"In that case…" He took his waffle cone and shoved it as far in his mouth as he could, (which was all but the last inch and a half) bit it off and swallowed.

Jou gave him this incredulous look, "You know you can tell how a person is in bed by watching them eat ice cream."

Kaiba returned the look, "And should I assume that's how you would be in bed judging by the fact that your ice cream is leaking all over you hand?"

"Ah crap!" He frantically slurped the chocolate that was running down his wrist.

"Even the little kids here know how to keep their food from melting in their hands," Seto laughed at him.

Jou hit him with a plastic spoon as he continued to eat his ice cream. "We're so sweet to each other, maybe we should go a few rounds in the ring to get it out of our system," Jou said with a laugh.

Kaiba had a wicked grin on his face, "You do know that I have a boxing ring in my house, right? You and me can go and spar in the privacy of my weight room."

Katsuya dropped his food on the table. "I'm not normally one to back down from a fight, especially with you. But I really don't think that would be a great idea."

"And why not? You were just saying how great it would be for us to vent our aggression," Kaiba was just smirking. 'Fucking with him is so much fun.'

"I was also going to say how I don't want to fight someone who's elbows are level with my nose."

"I'm not _that_ tall!"

"Not quite but close, I'm 175cm and you're at least, I emphasize at least, 15cm taller than me," Jou thought it was weird to be defending his short-ness.

Seto looked around and saw that at least three people in the shop were trying to inconspicuous while eavesdropping on them, and failing miserably. He picked up Jou's soggy ice cream cone and shoved it in his mouth. "Lets go Jou, people are starting to stare," he shot a dirty glare at the people trying to hear their conversation as he wrapped an arm around Jou's shoulder.

……………………..

Outside

"That was sickeningly sweet," said a voice coming from a figure that happened to be sitting on the hood of Kaiba's car.

Kaiba glared. "Would you mind explaining to me why exactly your ass is on the hood of my corvette, Dinosaur Ryuzaki?"

"Yeah, don't you have some baby to go take candy from or something?" Jou asked.

The dinosaur duelist rolled his eyes, "And don't you have some hydrant to go pee on?" He shot at Jounouchi.

Kaiba's eye twitched, 'He's _my _dog! No one else has the privilege to insult him with dog jokes!' "Look kid," Kaiba leaned over the small figure with a sadistic grin on his face and a gleam in his eyes, "See this trunk?" He pointed to the corvette's trunk.

Ryuzaki nodded.

"It's just big enough to fit a body in, so either go away or you'll be seeing the inside of it _real_ soon."

The boy just rolled his eyes, "Shove off Kaiba, or I will make your life hell. And that's exactly what I came to discuss with you."

"Discussing? I think not, we'll be leaving now."

Kaiba turned on heel and motioned for Jou to get in the car.

"I can see the headlines now 'Kaiba Caught Kissing His **Gay** Lover in Apartment Hall!'

Both boys froze in their tracks and turned around slowly.

Seto walked back over to stand in front of Ryuzaki. "What do you want?"

"Your brother."

"What!" Kaiba exclaimed, "What do you want Mokuba for you perverted freak!"

"Not like that, jeez, don't get your panties in a twist Kaiba. I want rights to see your brother… as a friend," he told them.

"Or what? What newspaper is going to believe some twelve year old when they say Seto Kaiba is gay?"

The teen smirked, "First of all I'm fourteen. Second, I won't tell them, they'll receive this picture of you two necking in your apartment hallway and let them have a field day with it."

Jou ran over and grabbed him around the shoulders, "Why were you in my apartment building in the first place ya stalker?"

"What is this, the Spanish Inquisition? I was three doors down in my aunt's apartment, to see my new cousin, they named her Haruka. Strike any bells Jounouchi?"

"His story checks out, Mrs. Hatagami had a baby a little over a month ago and it's a girl, I can't believe she's related to a bastard like you." Jou slumped against the car in frustration.

"Are you and my brother already friends?" Seto asked.

Nod nod.

"Then I guess I have to allow this, just give me the damn photo and any copies you might have." Seto sighed in defeat; a punk kid was out maneuvering him.

"Nice. A pleasure doing business with you, I will bring the memory card with me the next time I see you." Ryuzaki handed over the picture after that and left.

Jou nudged Seto, "C'mon let's go back to your place, we've had enough excitement for one day."

"Okay, but I'm driving!" Seto yelled.

……………………..

"It's not fair," Jou told him while they were driving.

"That I got to drive? Get over it."

"Not that. That kid was going to go to the press and then everyone would basically assume that we're sleeping together, which technically we're not," Katsuya sat there and pouted.

"We could fix that," Seto told him.

"What? Seriously! When!" Kaiba had caught his attention and Jou wasn't letting go of the tempting bait now.

"Soon, maybe." He took one hand off the steering wheel and started to run it up and down the blond's thigh.

Jou looked at Seto, "Drive fast."

……………………

Kaiba Mansion

'At least Mokuba won't be home yet. Place all to ourselves.' Those were the last thoughts in his heads before Jou jumped him.

Kaiba felt like he was spinning, Jou's hands just seemed to be everywhere at once. "Jou, bedroom." Best stick to simple phrases when your brain was fogging over.

The tricky part for the two was getting up the stairs, down the hall, into Seto's room, all without taking their hands off each other. Jou relinquished control as Kaiba's tongue asked for entrance to his mouth, which he gladly gave.

'He only thinks he's taking the lead…' Jou's mind told him, he had something completely different in mind for Seto.

Kaiba plunged his hands into the beautiful gold hair before him and grabbed the back of Jou's thigh, trying to hoist him up to make it easier to walk. He took the hint and wrapped his legs around Seto's waist, rubbing himself fervently against his thigh as he was carried upstairs.

By the time Seto kicked open the double doors to his room Jou had already been given enough time to fling open both their shirts and leave his mark in the form of a large hickey right above his left collar bone.

Kaiba deposited Jou on his bed as he threw off his jacket and shirt. He stood at the foot board taking off his belt when he looked up to see Jou lying wantonly in the center of his bed looking breathless. He only had a white button down on, fully undone and barely concealing him as he spread his legs wide in invitation.

Jou motioned for him to join him; Seto dropped the belt and walked over to the side of the bed. The blond haired teen turned and looked at him, "I want you, and I want you now."

Kaiba could do nothing but oblige his wish as he got on to the bed with him and made to kiss Jou. Their lips met and Jou started to rub against him and then it happened.

'He fucking flipped me on my back, nani!' It took him a moment to register what had happened while he realized there were no hands or lips on him. And then those silken lips descended on him again, this time lower, by his navel and moving further south still. He thought that there was going to be a hot mouth engulfing him momentarily, but that was not to be.

Kaiba felt his eyes jump out of their sockets as he felt a cold slick finger circle his entrance and quickly delve in. He gasped at the strange invasion that he had not been expecting. Jou pinched one of his nipples to take his mind off of what he was doing. "Just relax, I'm going to make you feel sooo good."

And Seto's number one fear of this relationship was coming true. He was bottoming out. The uke position was now filled. Kaiba is the pouf, how many other ways can we say it?

As a second finger was added he started to shy away from the fingers and squirmed around on the comforter. Jou stopped Seto's movements with a mind-numbing kiss. Seto clung to him and drank in his kiss like cool water. "You need loosen up," Jou slapped a pale cheek and felt the muscles give way and let him insert a third slick finger.

"It's hard to relax with three fingers up your ass," Kaiba grit out.

But just as he started to tense again Jou drew out two of his finger leaving only his index finger. He thrust hard into Seto's cleft and hit something deep inside him that he didn't he even know existed. Kaiba fisted the sheets and arched towards the hand doing wonderful, terrible things to him.

"Seto Kaiba, meet your prostate."

The brunet couldn't stop his ragged breathing. "Fuck you."

"No Seto, I think I'll be fucking you," Jou told him as he applied lube to himself.

Kaiba lay still repeating over in his mind that he wasn't really the bottom in this relationship, and then oh shit did that hurt a bit.

He snapped back to reality, his eyes enlarging to the size of saucers. Jou had penetrated him and it was hurting. Seto gasped trying to bring enough oxygen to his burning lungs. "Breathe, you need to breathe Seto," Jou told him as he sunk himself in deeper.

Kaiba took a deep breath it hurt less now. "You okay?" Jou asked hesitantly.

"Yeah, but you're going to have to move," he rolled his hips, letting Jou soak up the pleasure of his actions.

Then came his first thrust and Kaiba whined helplessly as that bundle of nerves was stroked inside him. "Jou if you don't move faster I'm going to flip you over and finish this myself."

His wish was granted, Jou thrust fast and hard having to hold Seto in place, kissing him with a bruising force.

Katsuya leaned forward and stroked Seto, "Come for me Seto." He hit that spot one last time with savage force to send Kaiba over the edge.

Jou kept hitting his prostate while he came; when Katsuya finally came he leaned forward and kissed Kaiba senseless before moving off to 'his' side of the bed. Aka the right side.

Seto was pretty much boneless at the moment making him pliant enough to be held in Jou's arms. They both lay there, basking in the afterglow.

But Katsuya sat up to stretch his neck. "Seto, why is there a huge pile of towels on your floor?"

Said Kaiba was nestled in the covers lying on his stomach. "I probably just need to have them washed or something." Jou lay back down and spooned up behind his boyfriend.

Seto looked up, "I never let my laundry pile up…" he said as he watched a pile of blue and white towels inched across the bedroom floor. "What the fuck!"

Suddenly Mokuba jumped out of the towels and made a mad dash for the door while spitting out a speeded explanation. "Ididnotseeanything! Ididnothearanything! Iwasinyourbathroombeforeyoucamehome!" He ran out of the master bedroom like the dogs of hell were after him.

Kaiba sat on the end of his bed; "Well I guess that covers how to tell Mokuba that we're seeing each other."

………………………

The Next Morning

Jou slowly stirred from sleep, looking around at the unfamiliar surroundings. 'Where am I?' Kaiba's room, that's right…'

He tried to get out of bed but found his legs entangled with Seto's and aforementioned person still sleeping contently beside him. Jou slipped as slowly as he could from the bed, his efforts were in vain though as his wrist was grabbed forcing him to turn around.

"Where are you going?" Kaiba asked sleepily as he sat up in bed, wincing slightly.

"We have to get ready for school," Jou replied as he pointed to an alarm clock sitting on the left nightstand.

The brunet relaxed back into the sheets. "I'm not going today, do you not want to go?"

Jou sighed, that bed looked awfully tempting… "I can't, it would look bad if we left school together yesterday and then neither of us showed up. Plus you're not my father, you can't call me in sick."

Kaiba knew that every word he said made sense but he could not help being slightly disappointed. "Okay then, get one of my uniforms out of the bureau for yourself."

"Why would I need one of your… Oh-" Jou saw his school jacket in Kaiba's hand which he must have scooped off the floor. It was wrinkled, with the top few buttons popped off (most likely from last night), and was slightly torn about the collar from their scuffle yesterday. "I will do that."

Kaiba smiled as he watched his puppy put on his uniform after he had gotten out of the shower. Jou walked over to the bedside after he pulled up the pant legs. "I think these are a bit too big on me." Just as he finished saying that the jacket sleeves fell down over his hands.

He got out of bed and removed a blue robe from the same bureau and donned said article of clothing. "Do you mind if I use non-professional techniques to make these fit you?"

"Uh," Katsuya had no clue what he was talking about, "Sure!"

Kaiba walked to a roll top desk along one of the walls and removed a roll of duct tape. He knelt in front of Jou, tucked the pants in under themselves and used the duct tape to fasten it. Jou gave him a quizzical look. "What? That's what you do if your suit alterations are messed up and the pants are too long. Plus, duct tape holds the world together."

"I can't believe I just heard you say that," Jou said after an outburst of laughter. "But something still needs to be done about these sleeves."

Insert dramatic eyeroll from Kaiba. He unbuttoned the cuffs and pulled the blue jacket arms up to his elbows, overall giving Katsuya a breezy, rebellious look. "Lets go downstairs, I want some coffee."

"Why do you drink that?"

"Because it wakes me up."

"It's bad for you."

"So is bingeing on food like you do at lunch everyday."

"Touché."

Kaiba glanced at the clock. "You should get going, do you want me to call the driver for you?"

"Nah, I can walk. But I want to have a proper goodbye." Jou ran his hands over the smooth chest that the robe didn't cover and gave him a kiss goodbye.

Seto heard a loud crash behind them and turned around. Mokuba was standing there and had dropped a glass of water he had been carrying. "I'm sorry, it takes some getting used to…" was all he said before walking back the way he came.

"I'll talk to him and make sure he's not mentally disturbed after last night," Kaiba assured Jou. "You just go to school and study hard."

"Yes mother…" Jou drawled as they walked to the front door together.

Kaiba kissed him one more time; "I'll see you after school then?"

"Mmm hmm," was the reply he got.

Kaiba watched out the window as Jou walked up the street until he was out of sight.

………………………

At School

"Jou! You're here today, you disappeared after you were sent to the principal's office," Honda was inquiring after his whereabouts.

"Yeah, I got suspended for the day no biggie," he smoothly lied.

"Was your dad upset you were home early?" Yuugi asked.

All of the sudden this 'Oh-Shit-I-Messed-Up-So-I-Have-To-Leave-Now' face wiped all across the blond's face. Jou ran into an empty classroom and took out his cellphone. He could hear it ringing on the other end but the answering machine picked up. "Sorry I wasn't home last night dad. There was an emergency that came up and I had to deal with, I hope you aren't angry with me. Katsuya."

Jou's day was same as usual, without Kaiba, and with teachers telling him to fix his uniform. Aside from that it was another ordinary day, he hung out with the gang, daydreamed in class, and thought about Kaiba a lot. He told his friends something about having to clean the kitchen and needing to get home. And he headed back to Kaiba's place…

………………………

Blue: I had major Writer's Block.

Carrie: And I came along with the 'Super Hammer of DOOM!' and crushed that block to bits!

Blue: Damn straight she did.

Carrie: **mutters** Redneck…

Blue: Heard that, I am not!

Carrie: There, we made Jou and Kaiba do it.

Blue: **loosens tie** And none of you people would report us, now would you? Ahem, Carrie make sure the story is on a disk.

Carrie: Si signora, in finire.

Blue: Say what? Stupid bitch… **boots her out the door** I'll call you when I need you!

Note from Author and Beta: This story isn't done, and we don't really know how it will end. Happy is what we're aiming for and at **least** four chapters is what will be put out before it's done. Next chapter! Sneaky Ryuzaki makes his first visit to the Kaiba estate while Seto wants Jou to attend a classy fundraiser with him… in a dress!

Next Chapter Title: Meet My Date, Kaoru.


End file.
